Christmas grief is nearly here.

Hi Everyone…It’s just around the corner now. Nearly upon me. I can literally feel its touch beginning to grasp me tight. Oh, how I’ve dreaded its arrival. But of course, there is no stopping it. Christmas will arrive like it or not.

Probably like some others, this will be my first Christmas alone for 33 years. And to matters worse, it was my partner’s birthday today the 14th of December. Again, her first birthday without her being here. I still bought her a card, though. I just couldn’t help myself. Later, I shall open a bottle of champagne (because we always did on her birthday) and think of all those happy birthday’s we’ve shared together. It won’t be an easy thing to do. Even though I love champagne too. And I know it won’t taste the same. She liked champagne at Christmas too. So I guess I’ll have to open another bottle. Again, I’ll probably not enjoy the experience.

And I’ve put the Christmas tree up. And decorated it. That wasn’t a pleasant experience either. However, my partner loved Christmas. So I just had to do it. It is lit up now as I write this. Twinkling twinkling. I hate to think what she would have said if I had not put the Christmas tree up! And it is so difficult to look at - because it makes me cry. And yes, all those happy people I see all looking forward to a happy Christmas is hard to bear. But bear it, I will. Or try.

So, I’m not looking forward to the upcoming festivities. I’ll just cruise through it. After all, it’s only one day. Boxing Day I will treat as a normal day. Hopefully. I wish everyone in a similar predicament my best wishes for 2019. For me, 2019 cannot be any worse than 2018. Or can it? I do hope not. RayJay…

I hope you don’t feel offended by this but with all the mentions of Christmas and it’s likely impact, I have been completely staggered as to just how important it is, or has been, to people. I really had no idea.
I feel to be in a minority of one with how I see Christmas and I’m beginning to believe that my wife was right about me after all. I just stopped enjoying anything about it when the kids started to pick up on the financial benefit to themselves.
I hope that everyone is able to enjoy things to the extent they want to or feel able to.

Sending hug Ray Jay.

Thank you trigger! I need all the hugs I can get. RayJay…

Hi YorkshireLad…Appreciated your reply. And no, I wasn’t offended. Well, I’ve never been that keen on Christmas. But my partner was. So I had to go with the flow. But just between you and me, in the end I looked forward to Christmas too.

And now she is not here with me, the thought of spending it without her is very sad. But I will do my best to get through the ordeal.

I send you my best wishes. And wish everyone else the same thing. RayJay.

My wife loved Christmas as well. We were like two opposing forces. I just enjoyed the time off work. I can’t repeat the things she called me. They were probably deserved. I just miss her every single day, even the insults. Best wishes.

Hi…No surprise, my partner called me names too. But as the years went by, it was a running joke rather than a telling off. And yes, like you it seems, the names were deserved. And like you again, I miss the insults and miss my partner being here every day. Best wishes for a happier 2019. RayJay…

You are wwlcome …

You are welcome …

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