Christmas is cancelled

Lost my dear wife a month ago tomorrow.
Funeral was this week.
Now it seems i’ll only be allowed to be with family one day over Christmas,
I hate the silence,I hate this house,I don’t want to be here, when will this nightmare end

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@Mickp Assuming you are now living in a single person household, you are allowed to “bubble” with another multi person household to form a family bubble. You are only allowed to bubble with one other household
The new Tier 4 restrictions have not changed this. I’m in Tier 4, son (and his girlfriend) are in another Tier 4, there is no restrictions on the number of times we can see each other. However I think it is important to be sensible

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Oufff that’s so tough Mick. I hope you can “bubble” with a household. If I hadn’t have had a family household to bubble with I would have been even more nuts than I currently am so I really feel for you and really hope you have a household available. I know the bubble we really want though is our beloved soul mates back but since we can’t have that we need people don’t we, I never realised u til these last months how absolutely devastating loneliness is. Fingers crossed for you that you manage somehow x

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No you can be in a support bubble which is not part of the Christmas arrangements.

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I’m so sorry to hear that your wife has died. When the news came on yesterday about the latest restrictions, the first thing I thought was how do we cope with extra loneliness on top of the loneliness of grief. For those of us who are mourning for partners, we lost the person who knew us best, and despite that, loved us unconditionally. It’s a very lonely place to be. Do you have people who you are happy to talk to on the phone? It’s a comparatively outdated mode of communication nowadays but I find that I am lifted by the voice of someone I’m fond of, even if they don’t always say the right things. Take care and keep in touch with us, Mick. We’re listening x

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Oh, Mick, I don’t know what to say to you.

I can only tell you how I cope with these feelings. I believe that although my husband is gone in the physical sense he is still here in the spiritual sense. At times, I can ‘feel’ his presence. We loved each other deeply. That love will never die. We will meet again in the afterlife.

My husband died in September.

Then there is the cliche that he would not want me to feel this way. He would want me to get on with my life, care for our dogs, find hope again, even a muted kind of joy.

He would be absolutely furious with me if I ended my life. And all the people who have helped me so much through the last 14 weeks would be utterly devastated. They would probably blame themselves…

Love, Christie xxx
ps I mean kindred spirit love - we are all travellers on the same sad and lonely road.

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Yesterday I was in a bad state of mind I realise that now.So I’m now clearer about my family bubble that I’ve been in of and on for the last four weeks.

Today was four weeks since she died. After the ceremony on Tuesday at the crematorium I asked family members to take the flowers back to family graves. Hers went to her daughters who died in 2013 others to her sister who died last year, and the rest to her parents grave.
I woke this morning and wanted to mark the hour and minute of her passing so decided to drive out to where her flowers had been placed and waited for the clock to reach that time.
As the time crept near two robins flew into a tree next to the grave and I now know she’s reunited with her dear daughter.
Silly ? Maybe but for me it was a sign, and not the first Robin encounter I’ve had over the last few weeks.


That’s lovely. I’m so glad that you found some comfort


I always look out for the robins too.

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