Christmas too soon.

Well it will be a year on the 30th of December since my husband died.
Looking back I think where did that time go? Yet it also dragged!
Doesn’t really make sense.
This Christmas I shall barricade myself in with a roaring fire, (extinction rebellion would not be happy), a pile of good books and let Christmas pass me by.
Certainly not giving up as there is still so much to enjoy in this life.
Just going for a long, brisk walk can be enough to lift my spirits.
Still going to Tai chi but as it’s only once a fortnight we don’t seem to be improving that much. But trying to perfect “cosmic” moves fills the room with laughter.
Hope my wonderful partner would be proud of me even if he wouldn’t have liked the vibrant new colour scheme of our home!
Still can’t get messages on this site though!

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I know what you mean about time… 7weeks for me and if feels like years. I’m so glad you’ve found some fun at your tai chi and have made steps forward. That’s all we can do isn’t it. Your Christmas with books, blanket and fire sounds perfect. I will add to that list a gin and tonic and we’re sorted. Hope you have a healing time. Love liz x

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I dont want to celebrate christmas it’s not 6mths since my son died suddenly. I go from weeping to normal,& so on & on
I just miss him, I’m still texing his phone telling him everything ,
I just want a tex message saying
I’m ok ma! Dont worry!
Just like he did regularly
But it never comes

I don’t want to think about Christmas.Although it was just the two of us,I made such a big thing out of it.Rob just went along with it because it made me happy.He passed away 2 weeks ago on the day he was being discharged.We were so happy at the thought of him coming home.
This Christmas there will be no tree or decorations.I just want the two days to go as fast as possible.He was the love of my life and I can’t imagine my future without him but I’ve stayed strong so far and I know he’s getting me through this.Sorry if I’m rambling but my FB friends must be getting bored with me now!

Hi Jill, we are certainly NOT bored with you because it’s so real to all of us. We know exactly what you are going through. I am a year along but still having so many different emotions and have a good cry every day but when that is over I get on with things. I e ven manage to smile and laugh. What choice do any of us have.
Last Christmas I was lost completely but my Gr children decided that I was going to have my tree and they decorated it for me and I’m pleased they did as it made me feel a little better seeing the twinkling lights. I walked around the streets at night with the dogs looking at the decorations in house windows and it did give me some comfort. No idea why.
God bless
Pat xxx

I’m crying as I write this but I can’t imagine my first Christmas on my own.I just want it over and done with.It was bad enough Rob died just before my birthday as well.I WILL get through this.I’m so glad I found all you wonderful people.

Where has the time gone!!! Feels like yesterday. This year has floated by in a mist, full of emotions that I never knew existed.
Your idea for Christmas sound good to me. If I’m on my own I will be going for a long walk, visit Brian with some flowers and then do the same as you. I might even go and do some work on my allotment, after all it’s just another day now and the allotment is where I feel closest to Brian and I can guarantee it will be quiet there…
I have started going to Zhumba classes and enjoy it.
I’m still planning my vibrant colour scheme and have the colour charts by the side of me but keep changing my mind.
Take care and good to see your still with us, problems and all!!!
Pat

I didn’t mean friends on here,sorry!I have found people here that are in the same boat and they listen.It’s been a lifeline! X

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