Hi I lost my mum 2 years ago on December 16 th 2017 she had kidney failure that day is also my birthday which I now hate December is such a hard month for me now I am single and now live on my own I hate Xmas but I do have a lovely family and great friends who I go to at Xmas I have a brother with Asperger’s so I make the effort for him I do now enjoy things it just takes time my advice to people is keep busy and be with people it does help and talk about the person you lost all nice memories are good my best friend as lost her parents so we talk about them all the time I still struggle alot but you just take it day by day week by week anyone who as lost someone lately you will enjoy things again and look forward to things again it’s a struggle sometimes but life does get easier and pain gets easier take care

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Thank you thats good to hear. The pain is so intense right now. I’m dreading my first Xmas without my mum. But I have family and two
Children. So for their sake I will plod on through. Even though I feel dead inside. Hope you are ok and I’m sorry for your loss.

Jooles thanks for your reply try and think of as many good times as you can it help year I remember that horrible dead feeling it’s so hard to put a smile on your face but I’m sure through your family you will learn to smile again I hope you can try and enjoy some of Xmas with your children things will get better in time you will enjoy things again best wishes to you

Hi jage,

I think your post will help many of us who are suffering recent, sudden losses of our mums. I know things will never be the same again but I need hope that they will get a bit better than they are now. My mum died almost 6 months ago and every day is like the first day again for me. I’m away at a live music weekend which I booked a year ago , and all I’m doing is crying every couple of hours.
I dont want a life if this is how it is going to be, so to read your post has given me hope that I will get there.
Cheryl x

I no Cheryl how you feel I still cry now but not as much as last year the pain will never go but you do learn to live with it and life will have some meaning again it’s just a different life without that person in your life my mum lived with me and I was her full time carer so it was a big thing to lose my job to as well as my mum but I do feel alot better than I did I hope people can read my post and know that their is light at the end of the tunnel and things will improve thanks

Thank you for your hopeful post Jage. I lost my Mum only 9 weeks ago and i had been her carer and companion for decades.

Thankyou x

Daffy so sorry year I looked after my mum to for years but gave my job up to do it full time because of her Alzheimers as well as kidney desease it is hard being a carer your mum will be so proud of you looking after her all them years I know it’s so raw for you just get through each day at first and in the future things will get better my thoughts are with you

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Thank you for your kind words.

Your post is inspiring. Thank you.
My birthday is December 16th and this Monday I’ll be 60. I was going to spend this weekend with both my sons but then eight weeks ago, my younger son Henry died suddenly, he was 30. I’m still struggling although have periods that are manageable. Yesterday was particularly hard with lots of tears.
I’m so sorry for your loss but am grateful to read that some level of normality can return.

Purple I am so sorry of your sad loss how awful for you time really is a great healer but it will take a long time my heart goes out to you some one else with a crap birthday b with your family and friends it does help being with people who love you thinking of you

I agree with you there Daffy, as well as being my mums carer, in the later years, she was genuinely my best friend.