Hi I’m new to this I just find that getting nearer to Christmas is so hard .
Over a period of 5 years I lost 4 children .
My eldest daughter ,her daughter ( my granddaughter) .
My youngest son ,and my grandson who I had as my own since he was 5 days old .I just can’t seem to get over my losses .the grieving never stops its like 1 every year I just don’t think I’ve had time to grieve and now it seems to be as bad as the time it all happened. I’ve been the strong one for to long now I just want to cry cry cry x


Oh Nannymave, I am so so sorry for all your losses, it must be almost impossible to get over the deaths of so many in your family, I lost my husband on the 21 st December and to be honest I just wish Christmas was over, every year is the same and it doesn’t seem to get any easier, but I hope for you that time does make it more bearable and I also hope you get some comfort and support from this site, sending love Jude xx

Hi Jude thank you for your kind words

I am so sorry you have suffered such terrible losses. I can’t imagine how you feel. I lost my beautiful daughter 3 years ago and it is such a struggle some days. I hope you have family or friends to support you. This site is also so helpful xxx

My heart is very sad for you and the loss of all your lived ones so close
I lost my wife in 1994 my granddaughter died in 1996 age 50 minutes son killed himself age 27 in 1997
But none of my losses can compare to yours
Spending a big hug to try to give you peace and love
Keith x

So sad for all your loses how do you cope my husband died in august I to am dreading Christmas . I’m not buying any gifts and no cards no Dec’s up just going to pretend it doesn’t happen. without him I’m alone so just a normal day and even them are hard to get though

I just cannot begin to imagine the grief and utter sadness you must be suffering, my heart aches for you…I lost my son four years this coming December and I will never recover from losing him.
My love and thoughts are with you…Marina xxx

Sad yand lonely people. I can try to understand how you maybe feeling as?Christmas arrives
I am not a big fan of it and for many years i like you simply hid away from it
And if i got ppresents i hid them away also
This will be my 27 Christmas alone
I think that i am being invited for my Christmas Dinner to friends.
So i will go and put on a brave face, as i gave done many times

But this year it will be slightly different as i am again going to be Santa in a?local grotto
It helps me to be strong and think of the problems of some of the parents and their sick kids
Ive done it before and it feels special and grateful to be?able to bring a little magic into other people’s lives for a short time and possibly help them forget their sadness

I am sending you all a hug to try to bring you a little strength and hope for your futures
Best wishes .keith xx

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I’m so sorry for this terrible loss . Christmas is not happening this year for Me I lost my so 3 week ago . You have been so strong and so open about how you feel . My heart is with you at this sad time

Hi so sorry you lost your son .i lost my son in april it hurts so bad . And alot of people dont understand its been good to come on here and know your not alone sending you hugs zoe x


Dear Keith,
Well done you for making such an effort at such a hard time. It is so easy to just hide away but you are being so brave. I am sure that thinking of others, if we are able to, helps us all in the long run. xxx

I am so sorry for all your loses, it’s so hard for all of us, I lost my son 2 years ago last week, and I used to love Christmas, now I just don’t want it here anymore, just wish I could sleep and all over when I wake up, all my love to all off you

HI Keith hope you enjoy your Christmas the best way you can I just don’t look foward to it anymore but it’s a great thing that your doing being Santa take care
Mave x

Hi Victoria its taken me a long time to get to where i am in my life, and be able to put those less fortunate than me 1st
I love playing santa especially for the kids, but i also will do it for free, for adults with mental health issues
Because sometimes they only have a mental understanding of a child less than 10.

This was my 3rd year in the grotto but hopefully i can do it many more times
Especially for children whose parents can’t afford to visit grottoes and otherwise never meet santa.
I know that my wife in heaven , will be proud of me xx
Best wishes keith.

I hope that things in your life improve emotionally

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Hi Victoria . Yes it was?hard at christmas and working in the grotto helped me to concentrate on the kids and the sad stories their parents related to me??
I also appeared in my own costume at a childrens nursery and at club for the kids who will probably never get to meet Santa. I was invited round to friends for christmas dinner. And happily i didn’t think unhappy thoughts. So hopefully my life will be happier and i will learn to love myself and in time be able to love another lady , who has?some similar interests and hobbies. Best wishes and a happy 2022 . Hugs Keith xx

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