My wife and I had two beautiful cavalier King Charles dogs sadly both now gone,
A few years ago I bought her a wall clock in the shape of a cavy whose tail was the pendulum and goes up and down.
The room in which it’s mounted I haven’t been in much until yesterday,the clock caught my eye and I realised I hadn’t adjusted it from last spring,so the last time it was accurate my wife was still alive,ime afraid I fell apart.
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I have also fallen apart today, quite unexpectedly. I had to have a routine scan at hospital and when I got there it just hit me. The location was near the unit where my partner of 20 years had a tumour removed last summer. He had chemo, major surgery in February, got the all clear then a scan discovered cancer had spread. He passed away in July. Letters more or less crossed in the post. He was 59.
It didn’t impact me from an address within the appointment letter.
I managed to pull myself together somewhat for the scan.
I now realise there will be many triggers, until perhaps there are no more, or our hearts and minds may get more prepared and resilient.
I am sorry for your loss. In the words of Leo Sayer, their love is still with us, and that won’t ever be taken away.
‘When I need love
I hold out my hands and I touch love
I never knew there was so much love
Keeping me warm night and day.’
Best wishes
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Not that I’m a fan, the song just came to me from nowhere the other day 
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Yes, it’s the little things. Today I had to drive to meet someone; the last time I went to that village was 11 months ago, and it was when I got home that the police came round to tell me John had died. It was hard, very hard to take that same road. Another first over with; but each time there’s a ‘first’, it puts them further into the past.
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I put a like in agreement with your conclusion, but of course it’s devastating that we’re in this position.
Sending heartfelt best wishes, and strength.
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Sometimes its difficult to explain the things that trigger a meltdown. I went into the garage and saw my husbands jacket hanging on the dropsaw - he was a builder- as if he’d just popped out. Breaks me every time x
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