Hi, it’s been nearly a year since my last post: Lighting a Christmas Eve Candle. A year of two halves as recently I’ve struggled to cope and have dipped back into this site as I do from time to time.
You see it’s been eight years since my beautiful husband died. How did I get here…lots of therapy, help and support, graciously taken and now given back through volunteering.
So what’s happened today? A letter addressed to my husband regarding a vehicle finance refund. A huge trigger for me… I made the car payment in full when he first became ill and was admitted to hospital. I had to surrender his driving licence when he came out of hospital and subsequently sell the car back to the dealer. My husband watched from our front step and it broke his heart. He died just over 18 months later… did he have any capacity to know why I had done all this?…very unlikely… he was the kindest soul I have ever or am ever likely to meet. Heartbroken all over again 
Kind regards to everyone needing their voice to be heard by someone today 
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I just wanted to let you know that you have been heard and you are not alone.