Coping alone

My darling husband died 9 months ago and I still miss him every day. My daughter is getting married next year snd my son the following year and however much I am happy and looking forward to them I’m also dreading walking in, sitting on my own. So used to having my John to share everything with and I’m dreading having to go through this on my own. I’ll need to be happy and bright and excited and yet inside I will also be breaking


Dear Jackflash

I lost my husband last September in a bike crash. Our son has started to look for wedding venues and has told me he wants to leave an empty chair on the top table to represent his loss. The day will be difficult enough so I hope that he will reconsider as it will already be a difficult time for me without my husband at my side. I know that bookings have to be made well in advance so hopefully he may find an alternative way to acknowledge his dad.

Thinking of you.

Oh wow I really don’t think I could face that, I really feel for you. How about a nice framed picture or a memory book instead of the empty chair?

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Son is quite stubborn. But hoping as time passes (for him at least) he will reconsider and perhaps the venue he decides upon can come up with something more empathetic towards me.

My son is getting married this November my husband sadly died 11 weeks ago he was to be my sons best man I also have this problem he wants the chair left empty where my husband would of been sitting I’ve no idea how I’m going to manage through what should be a happy joyful day celebrating
Iam dreading it

Dear Ali21

I have looked into alternative ways to remember/honour a parent at a wedding ceremony. Amongst them are to have their memory sewn into the suit, to wear their cufflinks or to create a memory wall.

I feel for you I really do and will be thinking of you in November.


I feel for you as my husband died 9 months ago and I have my sons wedding in a couple of weeks I want to be happy for them and I am but I also know it will be very hard he should be there with us and I know my son is going to find it hard to I know hell be there in our hearts but we want them there in body my daughter is planning hers for next year and I feel I should help but I just can’t I can’t seem to move forward just relive that terrible day over and over we will have to put on a brave face and try our best my thoughts are with you x

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My future daughter in law has asked for some of my husbands ashes for cufflinks for my son.
I feel this is going to be the hardest day apart from my husband passing and his the wedding I can’t even think about it

Dear Ali21

I am so sorry and I understand how you must be feeling. I have spoken with my son today and told him how I feel about his proposal and put to him a few alternative suggestions. In comparison to your son’s wedding though I have a good while yet for him to reconsider.

Sheila x

My mother died 8 mths before my wedding and I wore her wedding ring as my wedding ring and had her photo on the head table. Maybe he could do something similar.