It’s now 2 months since my beautiful boy Daniel just 16 yrs was horrifically killed on his moped. 4 months before that his Dad took his own life after months of mental torment.
I’m still coping too well almost like nothing has happened. I’ve been to the Dr’s and he said maybe I’m suffering PTSD stopping me being able to grieve properly. He has suggested therapy. I saw a counsellor last week and she was lovely. We talked and mostly about the upset and trauma in the year leading up to my husbands death - he was so ill I had got scared of him. He was a completely different man.
I’ve googled PTSD I don’t have any of the symptoms.
I’m not sure how a councillor will help but I’ll give it a try.
Yes I get upset sometimes. Yes I always feel sad. Am I missing my son? I really don’t know. He was at his girlfriends house so often and then came home to bed and then to school when he got up. I really didn’t see him very often. I didn’t cook for him he ate at his girlfriends mostly so my role as mum came down to making sure he got in on time at night (he did) and sometimes waking him on a morning. Transferring money to him when needed. We did have some quality time together when he was around - I used to lie on his bed with him and we’d chat for ages but not so much in the last 3 months.
Is there something wrong with me?
Are there any other parents that have lost their children and life is just going on? I’ve been told I’m still in shock??? HOw would I know.
Welcome to the Community and thank you for sharing what must have been a difficult post to write.
There is nothing wrong with you as you are grieving. You have been through a lot of pain the last 6 months and you are still in the early stages of grief. It is a rollercoaster of emotions with good days and bad days.
I would like to guide you to a a few organisations/support websites that may be of help to you below.
The Compassionate Friends is for families who have lost a child of any age. It would be worth having a look at their website for further support.
Both these organisations will be of help and support to you. Sue Ryder have recently launched a Grief Self-Help Service which contains useful supportive information and will help you to understand and cope with your bereavement and grief.
You can also connect with members here on the forum which will be of support to you and who have experienced what you are going through.
Dear SamDan
There is nothing wrong with you at all. We each have to find our own way along this awful road we find ourselves on, we all grieve in our own way, there is no right or wrong way, we get through in the only way we can, which is right for us and it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks.
Keep posting on here, do look at some of the other threads where you will find lovely supportive people who are all suffering loss and helping each other just by being here.
Sending you much love, Ann
