Pam14
I was wondering if you have a pet if you don’t mind my asking. My cat is very naughty but I don’t feel so alone with her.
But I am lucky that my son likes to come and look after her if I go somewhere. That is the problem otherwise.
I don’t have a pet I have thought about getting one. But I have no one to look after it if I did get the chance to go away
I lost my husband two years ago In some ways I’ve adapted the earth shattering grief has subsided, but I wake up everyday sad and feel so alone.
It was second time round and we were so lucky to have found each other after our first marriages were over. We were now part of one wonderful big loving extended family life was great, but David past and it all fell apart, we were together for 17 years the best of my life. I do have two daughters but one has no children and is busy with a career the other remarried and since then things have not been good as new partner resents i see her ex who I’ve known. For 20 years and who my first grandson lives with I’m not allowed to see my grandsons of her new relationship because I still see her ex, he stood in for my dad and gave me away when I got married and was an absolute brick when David was ill, so I won’t ostracise him I’d lose seeing my grandson as well as he lives with him. So I’ve lost my wonderful husband and don’t really have any family that cares so life is difficult and very lonely at times.
I am blessed with great friends though and they have got me through very tough times , but they are not all local, I go to my garden club and enjoy the social interaction , I’ve joined U3A and other clubs but not sure where I fit, sometimes I don’t want to be in large groups it makes me feel more alone, but I’ve tried, finding where you fit after you’ve lost your partner is tricky if you don’t have family. I’ve always been a look after others person a family orientated Mum sort of lost my way now.
Oh dear didn’t mean to say all this but as well as losing David I now don’t seem to have a family that cares. On the bright side, there always is if you look hard enough, I have wonderful friends who have got me through these difficult times so I’m blessed in someways . I miss my husband everyday one day I will be happy I guess until then I’ll keep trying , does anyone on this platform wake up happy - I need to change my life but not sure how to, I’ve done so well on my own so will give myself a pat on the back for that but I just want to wake up looking forward to my future with optimism and hope for a happy life sometime in the future I’ve have good days and not so many bad now so I’m on the way I guess just takes time. Love to you all it’s tough x
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Does anyone wake up happy?
That was the question asked .
If the sun is shining and there is a blue sky and I have got on top of things a severe is something to look forward to maybe I can control my anxiety which walks with me. If I feel in control it helps.
I am getting there slowly.
I can’t remember the last time I woke up happy or went to bed happy
My family don’t understand and most of them are not interested they never call me nor come to see
I do have one daughter that comes round once a week so I guess I have to be greatful for that
I have joined groups to try and make friends or to have people to talk to I don’t have friends I never needed them because I had my husband he was my best friend and now he’s gone and I feel really lonely and sad x
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Yes being grateful for what we do have. I have an old cat to keep me company.
I for ed myself to go to a one off flower club demo last night.
I found two hours too long to sit through.
I only ever go infrequently because of that. I like to arrange flowers how I have done and just went to learn few tips.
I was exhausted by time got in and slept better. Usually I fall asleep in the evening.
But I have to give it a try. Sort out what I will keep on doing and what won’t.
I preferred the church choir singing because it wasn’t just passively sitting there. I went to another singing charoke style altogether and
didn’t get on with that so don’t think I will go back again.
Today weeded the back garden while soil was damp and easier to pull them out.
It is terrible without are loved ones
I only have a small garden so it doesn’t keep me very busy but I went out weeding a sweeping to try tidy it a bit
My garden front and back is small too. Leaves from next door and their overhanging stuff cause masses of sweeping and loss of light. I have to cut back on my side. This year has been more rain so more weeds but I do think it helps I have lots of tubs as well
I’ve my next door neighbours bushes to cut on my side they are about 8 foot tell have to get my son in-law to do it
They block the light in my living room
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Yes same here my two sons help a bit. But I still hack around myself what I can do
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I do try and cut the grass and do the other jobs in the garden my husband wasn’t really a gardener he just liked to sit out there when the sun was shining
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That is what I like to sit outside so when he died I treated myself to a table to put the parasol in and got some free chairs. My husband wouldn’t do that so was a statement of what I like now time no need to go without because he didn’t want it. Glad I did. So stupid how I put up with what he wanted and when did have tables etc he couldn’t wait to dump them like this e.g if I wanted he didn’t he just got rid of in spite. He had some nasty behaviours in some ways I don’t miss. He did what he wanted at my expense often.
But I have peace now it has settled down. I have some nice memories as well and was devastated when he died. On here everyone only talks about the good side and feels like is that always how it is one hundred per cent of time?
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My husband could be the same he nearly always got his own way with things he always turned my my way of thinking into what he wanted
It wasn’t always roses and sunshine but on the whole we were happy and had a good life together
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N was stubborn and pig headed sometimes. Knew what he wanted. We both learnt how to compromise, but he was far more eloquent than I am and sometimes I feel like we did things his way because his reasoning was so clear but there are still things I don’t do because actually, he was right about those things…
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Yes glad not only one who’s marriage wasn’t perfect.