Hi I lost my father in 2020 and I’m admitting now I need help with how to deal with grief and loneliness.
I’m starting to become more and more lonely and pushing people away. I’ve become very angry and I resent those who have not paid their condolences.
I’ve cut people off, they don’t seem to understand what I am going through. I’ve always had a good life and I’m very grateful to God. But now I have so many other worries, like my mum who is getting old and lives on her own. My father was a great man he was my backbone. No one would mess with me because I had my father. Now I feel like everyone is being very mean spirited left right and centre. When you lose your father surely you should be more kind to that person. Not this day age no one wants to hear grief no one wants to listen. They just wanna know what’s your next holiday and what car you drive. My cousin was rambling on about his new career and how he’s going to expand all his businesses in Dubai soon, you can drive your Rolls-Royce I’m not interested, why should I be when I’m hurting inside for years and you haven’t even called me when I’m meant to be your ride or die Cousin.
I’ve kind of become a bit savage, the world is so savage people dying innocent children getting killed.
I don’t like the person I have to come I’ve become very bitter. I’m not motivated. If you saw my life as a before and after you would think what the hell has happened to this girl. The life of the party has been sucked out of her soul. This is what loneliness does to you. Most importantly I want to get my mental health back together for my children it’s not fair on my daughters it’s a cruel world out there and they need me to be as strong as I can be.
I think I need friends. Friend who understand me now. Not friends who just want to sit around with doctors and dentists and talk about boring businesses and how much money they can make.
There’s so much more to life. When my father passed away he didn’t take away his land or his houses or his wealth. He just went in a clean white cloth. No one cares about these things. These things don’t mean nothing. But people will remember how kind generous and how straightforward my father was, he was that type of friend he would never let his friends go.
I’m still young and I feel like Asif I’ve aged 1 million years. There is no one to speak to even my spouse is grieving because his sister passed away with cancer at the age of 38.
So we’re quite disconnected. That’s why I want this help and someone to speak to over the phone so I could actually start my life and help my husband get back to his mental state. My children are so beautiful they deserve a happy mother and father.
Hello @Anna786,
I’m part of the Online Community team and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how you are feeling. I’m so sorry to hear about your father. Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support. In the meantime, you may wish to look at these Sue Ryder resources which might be helpful.
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Our Grief Guide self-help platform which has information, resources and advice to help you through your grief
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Our Bereavement Information pages which can walk you through what you are going through.
You might also want to look at: Losing a parent - coping with the death of a parent | Sue Ryder
I really hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support and I also hope you feel you can access more support should you need it.
Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.
Take care,
Alex