Coping with the loss of my Dad.

@Cee I’ve started to come on here daily, and I find it comforting. It’s the ability to talk to others who completely understand what you’re going through. Despite everyone’s grief being personal to them, those central core emotions are what others, like yourself get. I know my life has changed forever, I don’t have a dad anymore, that’s the cold truth! Thank you for reaching out x

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@Mariesthename I think some counselling would help, and maybe through here rather than through my work wouldn’t be a bad thing. I know our journey initially is the ‘firsts’ of everything which I know will be tough. We’ve done the first football game without him 6 days after his passing which was very emotional. I lost my mum in law too 12 weeks before Dad so the house is incredibly sad. I’ve selfishly not even given her another thought due to being consumed with my dad and my grief. I’m sorry your still dealing with this too, I do feel that sharing things here, gives me some comfort xx

I could have written your post for myself!
It’s been 11 weeks for me since the loss of my mum. I’ve read so much on this forum that has made me see how grief is everyone’s own personal experience, I thought grief was a linear process, how wrong was I?
A manual would be perfect……you feel this way, then that way etc, but it just doesn’t work that way eh? I get frustrated with myself for not being able to move through it like I thought I would. I’m due back in work tomorrow on a phased return and I have a really supportive team but I’m not ok, I know their lives are moving along as usual and they’re happy I’m going back, it seems like they think it’ll be the same as before but I can’t see how it will be.
It’s definitely not selfish for you just want your dad still, my mum had Alzheimer’s and was a shadow of her former self. I didn’t want her to suffer but I didn’t want her to leave either!
You’re not alone in feeling the way you do, keep posting if you feel the need, share and let it out.

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Update to my last post,
lost mum 8 Aug 23 from cancer and now Dad from heart and kidney failure 17 Nov 23, Not sure how to feel yet as we spent so much time looking after Dad after mum only thing i know they are both free now and i will now be able to work through this double loss so close together. We are not alone helps immensely.

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@Grasshopper7GG Im so so sorry, everything will be raw, and much of your healing no doubt reopened to grief. You must let in run it’s cause, you must keep talking to people, even if it’s in here. Let the waves hit, mine are hitting again today but I’m allowing them too, instead of fighting them. Much love and strength to you

Xx

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@Grasshopper7GG Please accept my condolences for the passing of both your parents. One loss is awful, but two so close together? I cannot imagine. It must still be very raw. Like a feeling of whiplash, perhaps.

I am glad you have found this community. It is not going to fix everything and nobody has all of the answers. But I find connecting with others who have lost someone incredibly validating. I feel seen and I feel heard.

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I’m the same it’s been 6 months for me when I lost my dad, keep crying in work and getting emotional, I work with children which I find worse. Does anyone suffer with tension headaches? Not sure if it’s migraines or tension headaches, they’ve came on ever since my dad passed, feel it’s stress but not sure?

My boss is just worried that I’m going to get emotional again but I am as it’s my dad , apparently they can only do so much, but none of this is anyone’s fault, it’s just happened