coping without my husband

Losing a partner
1

My husband passed away 19 months ago and I so want to be with him. Yesterday would have been our 36th wedding anniversary.
I thought i was coping better but over the last few months things are getting harder.
I stopped taking my meds for a few months but have now restarted, but starting to find it hard taking them again. I know that without them i will end up in hospital, but i really don’t care anymore. I feel like I have gone backwards.

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Hello @Dawn08, I’m sorry to hear about your husband - that is devastating and how you’re feeling is completely understandable. I can imagine that your anniversary may be making it feel all the harder, too.

If these thoughts of wanting to join your husband become overwhelming, please call 999 or contact your GP for an emergency appointment immediately.

  • You can call 111 and choose the mental health option to speak to a trained mental health professional (England, Scotland and Wales only)

  • Samaritans are available 24/7 to talk about anything that you are worried about in confidence. You can call them on 116 123.

  • Shout are contactable by text, 24/7. You can text REMEDY to 85258 and talk to them about anything.

  • You can also find your local NHS urgent mental health helpline.

  • Sue Ryder offers an online bereavement counselling service. This is a free service and sessions are held via video chat so you can attend from home. There’s more information about this service here: sueryder.org/counselling.

You can also make an appointment with your GP and ask to be referred to counselling or other support services in your area.

You are not alone. I’m giving your thread a gentle, “bump” - I’m sure someone will be along to share their thoughts.

Take care,
Seaneen

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Dawn, take your meds. In fact, make an appointment to see your physician and tell them what is going on. You may need a medication adjustment, an anti-depressant, a sleep aid, or something else. Please go see your doctor. Get some help. It doesn’t have to be this way.

Much love.

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Thanks for your words of kindness. I have contacted my doctor and been referred to the mental health but i had one call from them on how to cope myself and nothing else. I find it hard to trust doctors anymore as in my eyes they are the ones responsible for him dying. He had bowel cancer and secondary lung and liver cancer. They said they could operate on the liver tumours, but they would have to stop the blood supply to the part of the liver. While on the operating table he suffered a stroke and they then left him without the operation for two months in that time the tumour had grown and we were told there was nothing more they could do and sent us home. I dont trust doctors anymore.

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