coping without my husband

My husband passed away 19 months ago and I so want to be with him. Yesterday would have been our 36th wedding anniversary.
I thought i was coping better but over the last few months things are getting harder.
I stopped taking my meds for a few months but have now restarted, but starting to find it hard taking them again. I know that without them i will end up in hospital, but i really don’t care anymore. I feel like I have gone backwards.

Hello @Dawn08, I’m sorry to hear about your husband - that is devastating and how you’re feeling is completely understandable. I can imagine that your anniversary may be making it feel all the harder, too.

If these thoughts of wanting to join your husband become overwhelming, please call 999 or contact your GP for an emergency appointment immediately.

  • You can call 111 and choose the mental health option to speak to a trained mental health professional (England, Scotland and Wales only)

  • Samaritans are available 24/7 to talk about anything that you are worried about in confidence. You can call them on 116 123.

  • Shout are contactable by text, 24/7. You can text REMEDY to 85258 and talk to them about anything.

  • You can also find your local NHS urgent mental health helpline.

  • Sue Ryder offers an online bereavement counselling service. This is a free service and sessions are held via video chat so you can attend from home. There’s more information about this service here: sueryder.org/counselling.

You can also make an appointment with your GP and ask to be referred to counselling or other support services in your area.

You are not alone. I’m giving your thread a gentle, “bump” - I’m sure someone will be along to share their thoughts.

Take care,
Seaneen