5 months since I lost my adult son. Im not coping. My daughter has fallen out with me. My grandson wont reply to my texts or phone calls. My son would help with this, he would say ah thats just the way she is (his sister) oh he is a teenager (18)how much did you see of me at his age? Now he isnt there to help with their loss (absence). He was my friend, he would say, come over and we can get fish and chips and watch a movie, we would chat about world affairs, computer games, books. He was my tech support and now my pc has a viral popup and Ive tried to remove it and he isnt here to talk me through what to do. I feel sorry for myself and then I feel guilty because Ive just lost him and he has lost his life. I would swop mine in a heartbeat if he could be alive instead of me. Now my roof needs a repair and the roofer says I need a new roof £14,000. Just before my son died I had a fire in a barn and although the insurance will cover the rebuild Im struggling to get contractors to commit or even to give me a quote. I contacted 9 contractors, 2 didnt reply, 2 said it wasnt something they could do, 5 said yes very interested…1 quote after months of chasing them. I need at least 2 for insurance to give the go ahead.
I have my sons cat and he has just been diagnosed with heart failure and thryoid problems, Ive spend £450 on him this month, it will be ongoing, but I cant give up on my sons cat.
Im sorry for rambling, my life seems to lurch from one emergency to another and my son, my help, my friend, isnt there to help me through this and I feel so guilty for feeling this way.
So am I coping? No.
Hi, I am sorry to read that you are not coping, no wonder with all what is going on. It’s such early days for you with the loss of your beloved son. I used to hang out with my son such a lot, eating out, going to get his food shopping and general chat. Oh how we miss it and understand your pain.
With regards to everything else going on maybe just try breaking everything down into sections instead of looking at it overall. It’s worth a try if you can. Just take each day, hour by hour is the best way I think and how I do it, but we are all different in coping. Be kind to yourself and give yourself time on this never ending emotional journey. Take care xx
So sorry for your loss, it must be even harder as it seems you were very close x
So sorry to hear about your son. It’s so hard when you don’t have the people there for you, who you’d expect would be. It sounds like a lot of things you’re trying to manage and a lot of expenses. I hope some of it gets resolved soon xx