Coronation street and other soaps

Yes Jill, I wonder what is going through our animals mind. One of our dogs has obviously suffered. She’s a very sensitive girl. She lies on Brian’s chair in the dining room all the time and for months, except for her walks wouldn’t move. As Brian slowly deteriorated she watched him all the time, never leaving his side but when it got into the last week or two and he was in a bed in the dining room she suddenly wouldn’t go near him. She knew I am convinced. Now when out walking and she see’s someone dressed as he did she runs over to them she puts her head up in the air looking for a scent and about two metres away will know that it isn’t Brian and turn away, although she loves men. She has developed a chattering of her teeth and this is anxiety. I lie her down and massage her to reasure her.
Did you go into town today and how did you get on.
Pat xxx

Yes I did go into town.It’s great having my bus pass!I only went to Tesco and Boots for a flu jab but I didn’t feel apprehensive and shaky like I did the last time.I might do it again on Saturday so the weekend doesn’t seem so long,weather permitting!The hardest part is when the bus goes past Caffè Nero.He loved sitting there with his Mocha,watching the world go by,but all these things are just good memories now.I don’t know yet if I will stay up here or try and move nearer my daughter and build a relationship with my Grandson.We’ll see. Jill x

That visit to town can be a bit hard especially if there are places that hold memories. I don’t drink coffee but Brian would go for one and do just the same, sit watching the world go by. I look in the window of his favourite coffee shop and expect to see him.
I have wanted to move from this house for years and thought that if anything happened to Brian I would soon be off. Well a year after he died I am still here, I just can’t bring myself to move, as yet.
Struggling with decisions is just not what we want at the moment, my head still seems to be all over the place.
Pat xxx

I suppose it’s too soon for me to think about it.I can’t see me spending the rest of my life here.I need to be somewhere that we never went to.I did consider a mobile home in Hythe,Kent which puts me a couple of miles from my daughter but the upheaval might be too much and there’s the cats to consider.I’m not parting with them,they are getting me through this.I might think differently in 6 months.

Jill,
It’s too soon to even think of any big changes in your life. I dont want to stay in our house. We only bought it last year so that mum could live with us. I detest going home now but I cant face putting it on the market, seeing prospective buyers and looking for another house.
I was advised right at the start that no nig change should take place for a good year or more after suffering a close bereavement c

To move or not to move!!! I would be quite happy in a mobile home, it would just suit me. I used to live in one when I first got married but they was called caravans then, I loved it. Of course had to move into bricks and mortare when family came along No chance in the area I live in though. Nothing suitable that is residential, only holiday sites and that’s no good. My dogs are also the most important.
I too can’t face the bother and strangers coming around my house and then having to find something suitable. Houses selling really fast by us and I would be frightened of not finding another suitable property. I have a strong feeling that if something is meant to happen then it will.
When I came to live in this area I originally had no intention of moving from my house with no mortgage and a good job in the Midlands although I was going through a divorce and on my own. I came down south to visit my daughter who was working here and had a fall breaking my arm and shoulder while out walking and hence never returned, and five years later met my Brian so it was meant to be. I was also advised to take my time.
Pat xx

I agree it’s far too soon.Rob was reluctant to move to this bungalow because he found it hard to accept his disability but over the 10 years we have been here,he grew to love it.I said to him"think of it as a garden flat" and he was OK with that.I filled up the bird feeders today and that was so hard.I haven’t been out there since before he died.Maybe it’s a positive step in the right direction.

A bungalow is what I would love but expensive in this area and hard to find. Our house was totally unsuitable for Brian in his last couple of months. Ironically he said he bought it (his house before we married) because it was quirky with steps all over the place. In the end he couldn’t negotiate the steps that went down to the toilets both uspstairs and down. The stairs were too steep for him also. You just don’t see these things coming. He was a fit walker and rock climber as well as a keen cyclist but who would have thought his terrible illness would rob him of the ability to negotiate two steps in just a couple of months. He said at the end he wished he had listened to me and we had moved to a bungalow when I wanted to.
In the beginning (and still do sometimes) I write down everything I do in a day, no matter how small. So that I can see how I am improving Yes, filling the bird feeder is a a step in the right direction but don’t be upset if you go a couple of steps backwards afterwards, the forward steps become a bit more regular however. I love my garden and a keen gardener but it took me months to enjoy working out there. I managed to keep it tidy but was always relieved when I had got it done and could forget it for a month or two. Brian and I always worked on the garden together although we usually ended up arguing about it. We never could work together in the garden or the allotments, that’s why we had a plot each. We did manage to laugh about this though.
Pat xxx

Awe Jill, at least u have ur sense of humour! I understand what u mean though, for me and my mum, it was always, ‘Last of the summer wine’. I do watch it now, sometimes, but it wasn’t the same.