I lost my husband 8 weeks ago. The pain is unbearable and I dont know how Im going to come to terms with it. He had been ill for years he battled through until the last 12 months he was finding it harder and harder to do everyday things. He found his life hard and, at times, intolerable. I tried hard to look after him while trying to maintain his dignity and make sure he didn’t feel useless. We moved 4 years ago to a place we thought would be our forever home, we loved it but after a year things changed more building around us spoiled everything and we became very unhappy living here but finacially we were trapped. My Uncle died in June and I am expecting an inheritance that will allow us to move. We were so excited but my husband died the day after the for sale sign went up. The days before he died he should all the signs of going back into heart failure, he was getting weaker and weaker he stopped eating and drinking he wouldnt let me call a doctor or even an ambulance. I knew he had been feeling wretched and my constant nagging about call a doctor was not helping. He had been in hospital earlier in the year and the experience had been horendous he came home with ulcers in both feet that took three months to clear up this was why he wouldnt let me call a doctor. In the end though I couldnt stand by any longer and called an ambulance, they took him to hospital where he died later that day. He died in the ward that he had had the previous bad experience we had only been on the ward 40 mins nobody came to us until after he died. Part of me is glad hes not suffering anymore, part of me wonders if I did the right thing taking him to hospital rather than letting him die in his own bed which I would have done had he told me he had enough and wanted to go. But most of all Im thinking if Id called an ambulance a few days earlier would he still be alive today. We knew his days were numbered and that he was getting more debilitated but I thought he was looking forward to moving and starting a fresh in the lovely bungalow we had found. I wish he had told me he was giving up we could have had a different last week spent more time together talked about our memories. Sorry for going on so long.
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Hello, it’s such a difficult situation to be in, I too called an ambulance even though my husband said No, I had to do what I felt was right out of love, if I hadn’t called an ambulance, I’d be looking back thinking I should have done.
At the end of the day he knew a new home had been found & your place was going up for sale so that must have given him some peace of mind.
No one knows when the time of passing is going to come knocking & in a way it must be less stressful that life continues as normal until that time? In respect of hospitals there a worry now but sometimes we really have no choice, just try to remember every decision you made was from a place of your love for him.
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