My friend bought me a car air freshener that has a picture of myself and Simon. She gave it to me today. I won’t put it into the car till I go out again. I moved the lovely bouquet of flowers I had from my sister in law after Simon died. I put it on the small table and lent the picture of myself and Simon against the vase. I went to get my cup of tea and sat on the sofa. Next minute the picture of myself and Simon was on the floor. It hadn’t been blown off. A carnation, the only one on the bunch that has bloomed. Had snapped at its knuckle and fallen against the edge of the vase and the bloom had hit the picture and knocked it on to the floor. I looked at it and the out of the window and on the fence post there was a robin bobbing. I would like to think this is a message from Simon telling me he is with me 
I believe if you think it’s a sign, there’s a high possibility it was a sign.
I get a strong sense my mum is still with me when I’ve believed in signs. Then I put it all down to logic and coincidence.
I’ve done a lot of thinking about it and thought about how I felt about the situation at the time and it really does comfort me and I believe it with all my heart at the time, so I’m trying to ignore my negative thoughts and really believe from now on!
They say humans are energy, and energy can’t disappear or be destroyed so there’s that 
I also believe strongly that love is the most powerful of all, it can’t just stop can it x
Well I’m currently watching BGT and both funeral songs have come on in the background. Is that a sign or coincidence?
What songs were they? I decided to catch up on i’m a celeb the other day and one of my mums funeral songs came on and made me think what just happened but of course me being me put it down to coincidence 
Was chasing cars by snow patrol and I lived by one republic
I was thinking maybe I can catch up tomorrow and listen out, sounds silly now though lol but I find when I hear the song I notice it more than usual, is that the same with you? And I hear it more often these days. It was panic at the disco high hopes x
I heard chasing cars often before and since. But the other one is never heard before or after till today, and to hear them both one after the other was very odd.
I lived, I picked from Rich’s favourites list after he died. Hadn’t heard it before.
I went through my mums youtube history on her mobile, when I was struggling to choose songs for her funeral and chose that one with it being the most recent song she listened to, when I found it, I just thought that’s the one, we used it for the entrance track.
Don’t know if you came across any of my posts, but I mentioned before that me and my auntie shared a taxi to our homes after visiting my Grandma once and the taxi driver turned the radio on midway and after the first song played, high hopes started playing and shocked us both and we managed to hear the full song just before my auntie had to get out!
That night I used my amazon music, I have the free version where you can only shuffle songs and I searched ‘panic at the disco’ and said “mum if that was you, earlier play high hopes first” well i was floored when it started playing.
And to be double sure I searched madonna and the song ‘hung up’ started playing. Me and my Mum made up a dance routine to it in the past.
And yet I still put it down to coincidence sometimes 
@Rammie , my husband smoked since he was a teenager, only gave up the last two years of his life. Since he died two years ago I keep finding cigarette ends on my front path, none of my neighbours smoke and I live in a cul-de-sac.
I like to think it’s Doug reminding me he’s still around and watching over me.
Debbie x
Monday I went to a meditation class. A Buddhist nun was teaching. Anyway I had read somewhere if your mind is clear of other traffic it makes it easier for loved ones to send signs. I am having a particularly bad day today.
Today driving the heater in the car started blowing cold air out. It wasn’t on. Also the radio told me the Dab station wasn’t available. Radio 5. Never had this happen in the area I was in. And now just coming up the stairs I smelt cigarette smoke, Simon smoked when we first got together. Said he missed them when he gave up. I went into the front bedroom and the bedroom light wouldn’t come on. Who knows if it’s him. But it all seems to coincidental not to be something.
Went to see Simon today. Didn’t look like how I remember him. I left him a rose and the letters I had written him 20 years ago. Yes he kept them. And I never knew. As I left. The lights flickered on and off. He isn’t in that box. He is walking with me everyday.