Hi
I’m 6 weeks in after losing my beautiful healthy 24 year old son and I’m really struggling to come to terms with it. I’m considering going for counselling. Has anyone had counselling and does it help ? What can I expect from it ?
Thanks
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Hi @Letty68 . Yes I needed help, I recognised that I was being continually beaten up by my thoughts. So I decided that mindfulness was the way forward for me.
So I found a mindful/meditation coach, which we use as a group, but on zoom, and it has been a HUGE benefit to me. After a few short months, calmness has returned to my life as I’m getting better and better at managing all these negative, damaging, thoughts which were bombarding. I’m now able to enjoy my life again. Indeed, today is (or would have been) my 53rd wedding anniversary, and I’m going to enjoy the memories.
So I’d highly recommend it, but every approach needs a lot of honesty, insight, and work on our part. It’s nothing like visiting the GP and getting a pill.
It’s been a life changer for me👍
If you want any more information, please ask.
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Hi Tykey
I would like more information on the mindfulness approach please
Kate
I’ll PM you, Kate
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Thank you for the information
Best wishes
Kate
I personally have found counselling a big help. A safe space where i can talk about what happened, without fear of upsetting friends or family. I did make the counsellor cry.
It is not for everyone, but on this path anything is worth a try as long as you’re comfortable with it.
Hi Tykey
Would it be possible to get more information from you please? I really need some help. I just don’t want to feel like this for the rest of my life.
Thanks for your info about counselling Nightwish1. I just cry all the time. I miss my son so much. I want to remember him with love not sadness.
Hi Letty, I don’t wish to be looking like I’m recruiting for my mindful coach, it’s just the one I happened to pick, and am extremely happy with what I’ve found. So here’s the contact. I’m sure there are others.
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I know, thats all i want the good memories and not the horrible one’s at the end. I think that’s why iam making myself to listen to music again. To try and remember the good times, but it’s double edge as it can also make me cry and very sad.
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Thanks for the link Tykey
Hi Tykey
Lost my fiance last January it’s been a real shock for me , I was wondering if you can help me as I would like to attend those mindfulness meditation classes that you mentioned as I feel they could help me , lord knows my heart and mind needs it I feel , hoping you don’t mind Tykey thank you so much . Xxx
Hi Sandra, I’ll send you a PM, I’m more than happy to help
I lost my partner 2022 and really effected me with the awful memories leading up to her passing.
I just cried uncontrollably day in and day out for weeks.
I was introduced to counselling by my housing association but this was not any time soon. After a consultation by phone which I was asked a number of questions on my state of mind, it was not until about 4 weeks later I was given 10 counselling sessions with MIND.
To be totally honest I found this helped me for a short period after that session and after a day or two I was again having the wrong thoughts going on in my head.
The problem with my situation was I didn’t get the help from palative care and did most of the caring myself for 3years.
That was my partners wish and I had to respect what she wanted.
So what i witnessed what cervical cancer does to a lady I would not wish it on anyone.
My therapy is i have wrote everything from feelings to memories,events and problems down on paper as a journal and 51 poems at present.
You will find what works with you if its counselling, meditation ,painting or poetry or even talking with the community. Talking on here is a good start as its full of valuable information and advice from people who really know how you feel.
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I started one on one counselling this week and I feel encouraged. I was able to tell her anything, all the weird thoughts and memories that I am having and I didn’t feel I was burdening her with my grief which I do when talking to my friends. I could cry as much as I needed without having to hold it back. I think it’s important to think about what is best for you. Many people like group therapy but I needed a woman close to my age. My daughter died age 42 with breast cancer last October and the physical need to hold her isn’t getting any better. Sending much love and sympathy your way.
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Try St Helena Hospice i start bereavement counselling with them next month or try cruse my Doctor reccomended them.Both of them should help.
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I would like to be able to have link to this if you dont mind thanks jo
If you scroll back up the page, you’ll find the link to Fiona. Good luck.
I tend to find opening up to a councillor or stranger is better than a friend because friends tell you what you want to hear.
Unless someone has gone through the bereavement journey or like a councillor been there for many a person and experienced a wide range of grieving processes, unique to each and everyone of us ,counciling is a good start to come to terms with your loss and you will gain the skills needed to carry on with your grieving and hopefully help to limit the pain of loss as you go forward in life.
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Agreed try St Helena Hospice for bereavement counselling i have an appointment next month.
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