I’m dreading next Friday it’s going be 12 months since I lost my dad I’ve had 2 lots of bereavement councelling Im still struggling feels like I’m never going to get over the loss of my dad me and my dad were like twins we liked the same movies laughed at them everyone always said I’m my dad’s double I miss him so much every single day I have good days and bad days I’m crying right now as I’m writing this I was never prepared for losing my dad I was the last to see him on the day I went with him in the ambulance and stayed with him to 4 pm then we got a phone call that night saying your dad has taken a turn for the worse but I was to late by the time we got the hospital he had already gone and I keep blaming my self I feel so guilty and angry that I wasn’t there I should of been there and I wasn’t I was my dad’s carer I live with my mum and dad and lived with my dad for 51years of my life with him I look after his cat for him now but he was mine and my dad’s cat all the things my dad did for the cat I do now vet stuff sorting his food out and feeding him letting him in and out my dad always use to say to our cat my little lad u keep that little ticker going and if your ever not feeling very well u always come home when everytime our cat comes in through the conservatory he always stops and looks for dad at the side of the bed to see where he is and still opens his wardrobe door looking for him I’m starting councelling soon again as I’m still struggling starting on the 13th November
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Hi David8
Thank you so much for sharing this with the community 
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I just wanted to let you know that you have been heard and you are not alone.
Take good care,
Rhi