I lost my wife in September terminal cancer we were together
40 years.
I am really struggling i know I am at the early grieving stage
However i dont ever think i will get over this loss…
I have plenty of family & friends for support but still feel alone if that makes any sense…
I dont want to be here anymore, i feel lost , i have booked
Some grief councilling next month , to try to work through this. I hope it helps, as i feel desperate while at the same time
Pretending to everyone i am ok…
40yrs is an amazingly long time… In one aspect you’re extremely lucky to have such a long time with someone you love… Id expect you to be lost without your wife… Most people after there loss of a partner would rather just die and be with them… It’s extremely hard to wake up each morning and have the desire to get out if bed…
You’re still very early on and it’s going to be torture for you for a good while unfortunately.
Friends or family can’t fill that void in your heart that’s missing.
I hope the councilling helps you in some way, I didn’t find it helpful at all… I found this, site more helpful then anything else.
People that know your pain and have helpful advice to aid you in some slight way.
All you can do is take it a day at a time, there really is no rush or handbook.
It’s all about time…
I wish you all the best on this horrid journey you’re on.
@Frasersimp59 So sorry for your loss. Like you I lost my of 40 years in September - 8 weeks and 1 day now so I know what you are going through I can’t sleep and wake up at 04:30 every day. I have cried every morning since I lost him. I find mornings, evenings and weekends are the worst. I have no children. The pain, longing and yearning is unbearable. I miss my husband so much - hi hugs, talking to him, his laugh, holding his hand, hear his voice. He was my world. All our plans for the future has been taken away. I can’t think about the future. I can only do one day at a time. I hope the counselling helps.
I have found this forum a godsend. Everyone in this forum are on the same awful journey at varying stages so they understand what you are going through. Post here as often as you need to and you will get the support.
Take good care of yourself. Sending you hugs. x
Thanks for your reply & sorry for your loss I hope things improve for you also . I must say i am glad i joined this site ,
So many people all going through the same heartache , its definitely good to share although difficult i feel its part of the
Healing process , i just dont know how long it will take if it ever does… i hope you can find some peace & thanks for your comments
Hugs back
Thanks for your reply yes you are right a day at a time is the best approach , everything else you have said is 100% correct
Its exactly how i am feeling & what i am experiencing, so glad
I have joined the site & reached out
I know how your feeling I am the same was married for 44 year. Have lots of lovely friends and family around but as soon as I am on my own the crying starts my husband passed away on the 4th July this year to Cancer.
Sorry to hear that , yes its extremely difficult on your own
I am finding sleeping difficult , hopefully for both of us things
Over time gets easier after 40 plus years its going to be difficult.
I have reached out for grief councilling at our hospice where
My wife was this time last year , in the hope this will help
I will share how this goes on the site