Dealing with pain

I lost my daughter(25) on 8/10 this year. She was found at home by her fiancé we still don’t know how she died. She had a difficult life, major stroke aged 20, developed epilepsy and had a disability. Despite this she was a beautiful determined vibrant young woman. She got a degree in June, was hell bent on being a mum. Thing is she took up so much of my thoughts and we were so connected, I miss her and the pain is all around at this time of year. I have escaped to Spain with my husband, but as Xmas gets nearer I feel so much loss- it’s also scary wondering how to move forward.

I can’t, or don’t want to, imagine how hard it must be to deal with loss of a child. I think that to live forward is a difficult prospect for each of us but we are all actually doing it each hour, day, week. It’s difficult trying to plan or even dwell on the idea of an uncertain future. Short term is the way to go initially. Presumably we become different people taking our grief forward with us. It’s a bit like building a new life around grief. We either stand still or move forward. Much as we want to we can’t go back. I’d suggest you look at website called What’s Your Grief.

I am so sorry for your loss. Your daughted sounds like an amazing character, who was determined not to let her problems prevent her from living a full life. Your situation sounds so like my own. I lost my daughter in August this year. She had suffered for many years and never gave in. My thoughts, as yours, were always with her, and I spent much of my life caring for her when she was poorly. She was due to be engaged the day after she died.
What wonderful brave children we had. I believe that one day we will be able to tuck them safely in our hearts and take them, protected by our love, with us for the rest of lives.
Sending you hugs xx