I lost my beautiful big brother 5 months ago. I have been struggling since he was in hospital clinically fit for discharge but he caught ammonia and sepsis I was with him right till the end. But I am left with traumatic flash backs. I find that these days I am lost in life and not sure what my purpose is. We were so close IAM 44 and my brother was only 57 I was his baby sis that’s what he always called me. I want to join him and my parents most days. Even my children have noticed that I have changed. Will I ever get back to being happy and enjoying life again.
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Hi @Suzanne.w,
I’m so sorry to hear about your brother. I can hear how lost you are feeling right now.
It sounds like you’re looking for support and I’m glad that you’ve been able to share how you’re feeling with us. It is very normal for people who are grieving to feel a bit lost and not know where to start.
We know that a lot of people experience suicidal thoughts when they are grieving, and it is often about wanting the person who has died back or life to go back to how we know it. We have a video about it here which you might find helpful:
https://griefguide.sueryder.org/support/suicide
There is lots of other support out there, and I would really encourage you to reach out and speak to someone about how you are feeling.
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If these thoughts of suicide become overwhelming, please call 999 or contact your GP for an emergency appointment immediately.
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You can call 111 and choose the mental health option to speak to a trained mental health professional (England, Scotland and Wales only)
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Samaritans are available 24/7 to talk about anything that you are worried about in confidence. You can call them on 116 123.
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Shout are contactable by text, 24/7. You can text REMEDY to 85258 and talk to them about anything.
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You can also find your local NHS urgent mental health helpline.
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Sue Ryder offers an online bereavement counselling service. This is a free service and sessions are held via video chat so you can attend from home. There’s more information about this service here: sueryder.org/counselling.
You can also make an appointment with your GP and ask to be referred to counselling or other support services in your area.
You deserve care and support so please, @Suzanne.w, get in touch with one of these services.
Take care,
Seaneen
Hi Suzanne
you sound very hurt and grieving right now. I’m very sorry you lost your brother. I lost my young brother, 2 years ago, so I too feel great sadness and a huge life change. I hope that you soon have more good days remembering all the happy times you had. I like to remember that death doesn’t change the love you always had.
Hi Suzanne, I am so sorry to hear about your brother. My brother died last year and, like you, I feel there is no purpose in my life without him. I loved him so much. I hope that as time passes your feelings will not be so raw and painful. I hope that for myself as well. All we can do is keep going on, one day at a time. It is early days still, so be kind to yourself, and don’t feel that you ‘should’ feel or do things in a certain way. Do what is right for you, and know that he died knowing how much he was loved.