Hi Scotsale,
I’m sorry to hear about the loss of your son, it sounds as though you miss him a great deal and I can tell that you’re in a lot of pain. I don’t think there is anything wrong with sending him messages or talking to him in your head. The loss of a child is a huge burden to bear and there is no right way to deal with it.
I’m glad that you’ve been able to talk about your loss here. There are a few members of our community who have sadly also lost children, there is a group who is quite active who often post here: Loss of our son aged 27
If you feel up to it you could join them, or maybe just read through some of their experiences.
All the best,
Hazel