My husband passed 7 year ago, at the time I thought I dealt with the grief by keep busy doing fun things with my children ensuring they still had routine. An event at new year which I attended for the first time since losing my husband triggered by grief and having met a new partner I then started to hate him I wanted my old life back. I resented him sharing my family when it’s not his and pushed him away because I can’t stop thinking about my husband. I want to be able to move forward.
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Hi Joyce,
I’m just over 3 years into my grief journey. I have now become settled in this new world I didn’t want to be part of. I have caring family and some very good friends that have never deserted me.
I know I don’t need or want another partner, I’m sure if I did I would be feeling like you do now.
I just thankful that I met and married such a wonderful husband and I am now just content to live out my days knowing one day I’ll be with him again.
I hope you find peace and make the decisions that are right for you.
Debbie x 
Thanks Debbie I felt the same way, but people were putting pressure on me to get back out there. Covid came along and that helped in a way as no one was out socialising, my could recharge. Then my partner came along when I didn’t expect it. The relationship after 2 years had gone into the next phase and I’ve took fright I have fled. I’m too busy thinking about what other people think instead of dealing with my on feelings.
New Year is always a sad for me, but I have never experienced the grief that has been triggered and I’m trying to process. My boys are grown up they have there life’s, and i feel angry that someone could/would share there life experiences when it should have been my husband. I am still very much a part of my husbands family life and I’m too scared to tell them that I had met someone else. I have told my partner how I feel, he is so understanding, I need to build his trust and allow him into my world.
I good starting place was in this community so I know I’m not alone with my feelings. Thank you and good health. Joyce xx
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