Denial/fantasy

I lost my ex partner 8 weeks ago. We had been split up for nearly 5 months when he died suddenly at 46. We were still in contact and there was some hope on both sides that we may be able to get back together but as he was an alcoholic I knew it may not be possible until he stopped drinking. We did have unresolved issues and I keep going over those in my mind, having conversations with him to resolve them and how we might have done that. I also keep thinking about us being together and thinking about the things we could do together and life experiences we could have. Obviously those aren’t going to happen but it makes me feel a bit better to think these things. I can get lost in planning ideas for travels together for example, or building lasting trust and commitment and how we could go about it. Is this normal?! I’m guessing it’s just a coping mechanism but just wondered if anyone else does that. Thanks

I still find myself looking at houses that would suit us, we didn’t live together but he stayed at mine 6 nights a week and we were talking about the future. I still see properties that have a bit of land and a drive for his large removal van, we wanted to set up a small business and needed space for it, and I have to remind myself that I won’t be needing that any longer.

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Oh I’m so sorry. It’s hard when you are hopeful for your future with someone and then suddenly that future is gone. I’ve been feeling like I don’t have a future, it’s hard to imagine knowing anyone else as well as we knew each other.

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