Dear Angiejo2
Thank you. We managed to get to the cottage after all and scatter the ashes. Grandson on the mend although we did have to get a stronger prescription sent up. The cottage was wonderful - me and husband had walked past it many times when our own kids were young always saying that we would rent it one day. This was not how it was planned though but it helped our little grandson immensely.
I still stood my husband’s family and a few of his friends down from coming up. We needed the flexibility to fit with our grandson’s health. My husband would not have wanted it any other way - our little grandson was his life, he loved him enormously.
The day on the beach was extremely difficult, heartbreaking, like loosing him all over again. But the location is a little piece of heaven on earth and hopefully it is a fitting place for him to be until I can join him and we can be together again.
I am sorry to read of your daughter’s struggles and it must be such a worry for you. Our husband’s were always a support in difficult times and now we have to try and deal with these things alone.
This time last year we were sitting putting the final touches to our retirement plans. I could never have imagined what lay ahead.
Take care. x
Dear Gary123
Thank you for your best wishes. Grandson is on anti-biotics but think he will need referral to a specialist. He was born with life-threatening conditioning and underwent three life-saving surgeries so is susceptible to infections which then lead to the ear infections and subsequent febrile convulsions. His dad suffered convulsions always connected to an ear infection - a condition that my husband had suffered as a child.
We did manage to scatter the ashes. I think it is very much a personal decision. I could not look at them so he was sitting in his wardrobe. It was also causing stresses for our kids. The location was a place where we had spent family holidays. A remote beach with breath-taking views out over the North Sea. Hopefully my husband will wait for me. I bought two little jars and placed sand from the beach into each to give to our kids. At least that way they can revisit the spot and refill.
Together and alone we were able to revisit locations where we had spent family holidays. Some places I just could not bring myself to go to as they held too many memories however so the kids went by themselves.
Back home today very difficult. Alone in the house. Like yourself I just need him to return back to me.
Take care and thank you again.
Glad you managed to spread the ashes in a special place and your family were with you. In two weeks I am taking my wife’s ashes to our special place in Majorca. We planned to spend six months of the year there in our retirement. So sad to know that will never happen. My three daughters and three grandchildren are coming with me. I don’t know how I’m going to cope on the day but know as a family we will be strong for one another. The grandchildren will always be special in our lives.it makes me sad to know my grandchildren have missed out on a wonderful grandmother.
I wish you and your grandson all the best for the future.
Take care
Gary x
Dear Gary
Will be thinking of you. Not going to lie it was the hardest thing to do. On the way down to the beach both grandsons were extremely quiet as if they knew the importance of the event. But it was a beautiful spot and hopefully the place he would have wanted to be as he waits for me.
I am sorry that your plans with your wife in retirement - like mine with my husband - were never fulfilled. All we can now do in whatever time we have left on this earth is to make sure that our grandchildren never forget their respective grandparents and know what wonderful people they were.
Take care.
Sheila x
Hi Sheila
Your right. I will make sure my grandchildren never forget how special their grandmother was. And hopefully sooner or later I will meet up with her again.
Take care
Gary x
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Dear Gary
Our eldest grandson was only 9 months when my husband died but his mum took thousands of photos as he had a tough start to life but my husband was by his side all day, every day. We had a short absence during the first lockdown but were allowed to give support to mum and so the photos and recordings resumed. The second grandson never got to meet his granda and that brings its own sadness for me and our son. But we have started a memory box for both grandsons in which we are placing photos and the little trinkets that my husband collected over the years. My husband kept all our kids hand-made items and funny little things that they gave to him as well as his own Scouts knife, hand-made tools from school etc. They will all be placed in the box.
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