I lost my husband in a blink of an eye, just five weeks ago after a tragic accident at home. I’m just struggling to believe he’s gone. The funeral was just a couple of days ago, but I just don’t know how to start processing this. I keep waiting for him to come home,
I am so sorry that, that happened. There is no right way to process. I lost my fiance 3 weeks ago to the day. He was fine, been doing the garden all day then became unwell and quickly passed. My world has crumbled around me and no one i know really understands how lost i feel. He was my world, my soul mate. His funeral is next week and i have no idea how i am going to make it through. We were getting married in September so have had to start cancelling things. People offer their condolences and offer help but when i ask for help they all disappear. I still havent began to process it yet myself. No i dea where to start.
So sorry to hear this. I am 9 weeks along. And I want to say it gets easier but I feel it’s getting worse. I too still come home from work and shout hi honey I am home. Then I realise he isn’t there and won’t be ever again. I didn’t think I would manage to get to 9 weeks. But I have made myself go to bereavement groups and speak to people. Reading support on this site does help. Makes you realise it’s not just you going through this. I have just finished reading Sasha Bates book Language of Loss which helped me understand some of the crap things we are going through. Sending hugs.
I’m so sorry for your loss. It is still very new. I too lost my fiancé 5 months ago. My wedding was next day so I had to cancel everything.
You will get through this. It’s early days. I still cry but not all the time.
If you had insurance, I’d advise getting someone to help as they ask for stupid things.
Thinking of you x
I’m so so sorry for your loss. It’s the suddenness, the inability to understand why this has happened that is so hard. One minute he was here, the next he’d gone.
My husband’s funeral was on Thursday. I will be honest that I felt sick to the bottom of my stomach as the day got closer
But we did get through it. It is true that the love from friends and family do get you through. I’ve never been good at asking for help, don’t want to burden people, but I’m learning that this isn’t something I can keep locked in.
People said they’d help with the funeral, but in reality it was me and my step daughters that managed everything. I hope you have someone you can turn to. I think sometimes people don’t know what to say and do, so they go silent. If you reach out I hope they’ll be there for you.
They may never know exactly how you’re feeling, but there are people who love and care for you.
Thank you so much for your message and I’m so sorry for your loss.
It feels like that now the funeral is passed there is supposed to be a magic button you press that moves you forward, but I can’t accept he’s gone let alone work out how to start to move on.
I’ve just posted for the first time tonight, it will be five weeks tonight that my husband passed, and can already see how many people are sadly going through the same thing.
Thank you for your words of advice xx
Thats very true, i havent been able to touch any of his things yet. His beers are still in the fridge, trainers still by the sofa and his tools are where he left them in the dining room.
Walking through a now very empty and quiet house has been horrendous. Makes me feel bitter that everyone elses life is going as normal as mine has stopped. Only this week ive managed to come into the bedroom.
I also feel like a burdon on people if i ask for help or cry around them. Ive been locking myself away from everyone so they dont need to deal with my emotions.
I make sure to talk to him as much as i can. I like the think he is with me and can hear me. I just wish i could know for certain if he is.
Thank You for your kind words. Means a lot. X
I walk around the house talking to my husband too. I want to believe he can hear me, that he’s still around. I keep thinking If I just turn round quick enough, I’ll catch him behind me. I know that sounds stupid.
I think I’ve been kidding myself he’s just gone away and will be back soon.
I feel angry too that it’s so unfair. Everyone can go back to their lives, but mine is shattered.
I know everyone has said it to me, but be kind to yourself, don’t worry if you need to scream, shout, or cry - those who love you just want to help
So very sorry for your loss
Lost my husband 8 months ago
Still cannot believe he has gone
It was his Birthday yesterday,the day before I had a meltdown visiting the cemetery
It’s so hard to us all losing our soulmates,
Take care big hugs
I’m sorry for all your losses and for all the pain you are going through.
I remember the early weeks of horrendous raw pain that no one will understand unless they have been through it.
I remember screaming and shouting and begging him to come back. Wishing myself dead because the the pain was so bad and physically wrenched my heart from my chest.
I remember wondering how the hell will I get through the funeral and wtf, this shouldn’t be happening, this only happens to other people, not me, not us! Why, why , why!!
There are no magic buttons. As hard as it is, you just have to put one foot in front of the other and slowly walk through this. You have to feel every pain to heal.
You will slowly find it easier, the days become lighter and the pain less consuming, the rawness fades but it doesn’t go away.
The pain will live with you, initially inside you gripping you tightly, then it will slowly loosen its grip and release you and it will walk beside you but you can access a life.
Eventually I hope the pain will release me and walk way way behind me and I will move forward without it. My partner, I hope, will always walk beside me, where ever I end up.