In 2012 John was informed secondary cancer was in inoperable but a trial treatment was available. After the trial ended he had a brief break and we went to Venice & Florence, our last holiday. John wasn’t strong enough to fully enjoy the holiday. That’s when John started preparing for the end. We picked a spot we liked and bought the plot at the cemetery for both of us. He arranged for a funeral director to come round but I got so upset I ran up in tears. I regret that very much, John was trying to make things easy for me, I realised that - too late… John and I discussed the funeral with our parish priest. He said the bonus of knowing in advance was that it gave him a chance to write goodbye letters to everyone. I distributed these before the funeral. There was a letter for me as well as a recorded video message which I watch every evening. The video is the most precious, priceless gift John could have ever given me. There was also a letter and CD for the Parish priest about the funeral service, hymns and a special song. John also left a list of names, addresses and phone numbers to contact regarding his pension, widows allowance etc. He’d paid off outstanding payments on hire/purchase items so I wouldn’t have to worry later. Basically what John did was put his pain and distress aside and concentrated on getting things in order to make my life easy. He loved life and fought hard to stay alive but that didn’t stop him from getting his affairs in order. He was always well organised.
I hope anyone reading this finds it helpful.
Do excuse any errors, I probably won’t post it if I read through it.