Do I even have the right to be upset

So for the past 7 years ive getting upset over the fact I lost a child that I didn’t even know I was pregnant with I finally come to terms with I’ve got a fear of landlines because that is how I lost the child is being hit in the stomach with one i haven’t even owned a landline since but do I even have a right to be upset about it and even litten it affect me even to this day? I’ve miscarriage before and it never got to me and I can’t quite work out why this one has and still does sometimes I think it’s because of my son and the hell I went through with him and his dad trying to force me to abort him or if it’s something else im not even sure why I’m even posting this to be honest could be to-do with recent events which has brought up aload of negative feelings and bad memories I don’t even no what to really expect from wrighting this or even it’s just to get it off my chest as I don’t have any friends to talk to

Hi Toni,

I’m so sorry to hear that you lost a pregnancy seven years ago and that you are struggling to come to terms with it. You absolutely have a right to be upset. I read your other post and I’m also really sorry to hear that you lost your grandad and your auntie - it is understandable that the recent loss of your aunt has brought up bad feelings from your other losses and made you think of them again. I hope that it helps even a tiny bit to be able to get things off your chest here. All of our users have lost someone and will understand at least some of what you are going through.

Another really good place to get support is The Miscarriage Association, who offer a helpline, an online forum and offline support groups. Find out more: https://www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/how-we-help/

I read in your other post that you are worried about how to tell your children about your most recent bereavement, and how to support them. We have some information on our website about supporting children with bereavement, which you might find helpful: https://www.sueryder.org/how-we-can-help/someone-close-to-me-has-died/advice-and-support/how-do-i-support-a-bereaved-child

Winston’s Wish is another good organisation that offers advice on supporting bereaved children: https://www.winstonswish.org/

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