I’ve read so many threads here that I can relate to. My darling husband died in June 2022 only three weeks after he was diagnosed. I recently sold my house and moved back to the town where we used to live. I thought i would feel much better taking positive steps to move forward, but instead i am sitting here in my rented flat with crushing depression and loneliness. I am in my early 70s and i don’t have any family, just a small dog. She has separation anxiety, which makes it difficult to go out and do new things unless she can come along. So many friends encouraged me to come back and talked about all the things we would do together, but most have been too busy to see me. For me, this second year has definitely been worse than the first, and i see that that is true for other people here as well, but I wonder if there are also people here who’ve lived through this and could give me some hope that things will get better one day?
Hello @MissPuppy,
I’m so sorry for the loss of your husband. Thank you for sharing this with us. I’m just giving your thread a gentle, “bump” for you - hopefully someone will have some thoughts to share.
Take good care,
Alex
Hi @MissPuppy
So sorry to here about your loss of your husband. My husband passed away on 8th June 23 suddenly and unexpectedly at 63.
I am 66 and just retired and we were looking forward to many things travelling and spending time together growing old but it was not to be.
I know the loneliness anxiety and heartache 
you are going through.
People seem to disappear once you become a person on your own now. Some friends stay but now you have to find new ones and that is hard.
I live just outside Edinburgh and a bit isolated here as i dont drive i have thought of moving closer to town but too early to make any decisions.
Hopefully it will get better one day 
In the meantime take care and carry on somehow we will get through our days.
Lynne x
My brother lost his wife to cancer -he nursed her as long as he could then she had to go in hospital where he stayed most of the day to comfort and be with her- he told me that its very hard to get through and you do eventually get to a point you can get by -it dose get better and you will be able to cope. I am going through it myself and i get help from my brother telling me it will get better but it dose take time. As they say time is a healer. I do hope you feel better soon,xx
Aw … its so hard isnt it … everybody gets on with their lives and they dont care that you are so alone 
i haven’t moved and from what you say it probably wouldnt make much difference … people are just generally so selfish these days … its so hard without our husband isnt it … the love of our lives ! Probably the only person that ever really cared about us … thats how i feel anyway a year into this ! I miss him so much - his care, his love. One day the pain we feel will get easier they say … i dunno if thats true or not but i know that its a crap journey we are on and its so very unfair … we have to somehow carry on i suppose but im not really sure why ? So we can be in agony for rest of our lives ? Feeling so negative today … sorry ! Not much to look forward to really ! Im very angry at the moment cos life just doesnt seem to give you a break does it … the agony just seems to go on and on … xx
From my own experience I can honestly say life doesn’t ( and probably won’t) get better. I’m sorry to be negative, but I feel it’s best to be realistic, then any small improvement will be a bonus . I also relocated to a flat , not being able to stay in the home we lived in jointly. I’m hoping that in time I will get used to this way of life but it’s early days . I’m sorry I can’t be more positive at the moment.
Hi miss puppy, I lost my partner 2 days before Christmas, I have comfort from my family and friends , but I go home and close the door and the pain and grief is unbearable, I cannot see a way forward, How do we learn to cope
I am 11mths on now and from my own experience the rawness, shock & numbness does ease. The missing them doesn’t go away and why would it? you learn to incorporate the loss into your life so yes it will always be a companion.
I’m a believer that life is what you make it. We can’t change what has happened but we all have a choice of how we respond to it.
I have made new friends, I go out more than I ever did but don’t get me wrong, it all takes a lot of hard work and effort until it begins to feel your new normal. This also comes with time and doing what you feel you are capable of without putting yourself under pressure. None of us like the emotional pain and heartbreak of losing a loved one but it’s there for a reason, to remind us of love. That we were loved and we reciprocated that love and that it was a blessing. I personally have never wanted to escape the pain and heartbreak, I wanted to feel it all, process it and understand it. It’s all love with nowhere to go and the challenge is to now find an outlet for all that love and through that love our loved one’s will always live on through us, in our hearts, thoughts and all that we do. That’s the legacy they leave us
Lovely comment,I feel much the same way but at 7 months a little early on the journey but I will get there.
Have you heard that saying : grief is love with nowhere to go … i still miss him now after12 months … he was my rock and such good company too … x. Oops soz u just said that…it shows we loved them though too … xx
@miker
There is no timeline, we feel what we feel and go at our own pace. There will always be up’s and down’s, it’s part of this journey and there is no destination only where we want it to be, when we are ready. I think it’s important to go through every emotion and to process it all. Lyn x
Hi @Sarlyn
Too true no timeline now.
Taking a day at a time 7 months for me.
Unfortunately 3 week before christmas mum had a bad fall outside and i had to look at long time care she has dementia for over 7 years now and needs the extra support so i have been kept busy.
This year Jan in particular has been hard and im now back to being weepy hope it passes soon as dont have energy to fight it
Lynne x