I lost my beautiful husband just six weeks ago. I have good family & friends around me. They all say i am being strong…as i promised him I would be…
But i am broken inside. And so very lonely…
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Nobody can know how you feel. But most of us on here have a pretty good idea.
My amazing husband of 33 years died three weeks ago. No warning. No time to prepare.
Although I had three decades of joy I feel robbed of our future. We had so many plans for our retirement. He was just 54, I’m 58. I’m angry and bitter and bereft. He left me behind!
I’ve got a load of amazing friends, and some family, who try to fill my well of loneliness. It’s pointless: I don’t want friends, I just want him!!! Their love is lovely and essential, but nowhere near enough. It’s nothing like what had.
I’m so so so sorry for you. I fear we’re on the same bus, just a bit ahead of each other. I have no advice for you. I just want to say that the people on this group get it. Nobody else can possibly understand. The pain and grief is overwhelming, but we’ll all listen.
You are alone, but we are with you.
Try to sleep. Happy to talk tomorrow.
J
I understand how you feel, I lost my beloved husband on 23rd November 2024 to cancer, we had been together for 22 years.
He had just turned 50 in june. I never thought I would be a widow at 51
I miss him everyday and lost without him.
Im so sorry for your loss
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I lost my partner three weeks ago so I absolutely understand how you are feeling.
You can be in a room full of your family and friends and you smile n sometimes laugh but inside you are an absolute quivering wreck with really nothing to give.
It’s grief and it’s exhausting and like so many say on here one day at a time. It’s not easy and we don’t really want to get out of bed.
Be kind to yourself and do exactly what you want to do. Cry, stay in bed, howl to the moon but keep telling your loved ones that’s how you feel and they will understand.
Hopefully one day the fog will lift and we will stand facing the sun and the shadows will be behind us…
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My heart goes out to all of you who are still in the painful first few months of shock, despair and desperation. My beloved husband of 55 years died unexpectedly 9 months ago and I remember not wanting to face another day without him. Like you all, I found this site and different experiences resonated with me and became a lifeline. With the help of my children and grandchildren I’ve been able to join the human race again and find joy in life. I’m still a work in progress but I’m getting there! Take baby steps at first and do what feels right for you. Grief comes from love so it lives with me now, sometimes quietly and sometimes not. I’m learning that I’m not moving on after my loss but I’m moving with it. Be kind to yourselves. Sending you all big hugs.X
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Bookbug, I know how you feel. For me it’s been 5 days after losing my beloved to cancer. It’s the being so terribly lonely that hurts so much. He was my soulmate and I adored him. Like you I feel empty and exhausted with grief. I hope you and I will begin to see a path beyond all of this pain one day, until then I tell myself each morning just put one foot in front of the other and try. It’s hard so so hard.
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I know how you feel, I lost my beloved husband on 23rd November 2024 to cancer.
Im so sorry for your loss
@Westminster3west
I am so sorry for your loss and it’s so very raw for you.
Keep coming on here and hopefully people can help you. It’s the worst path you’re going to walk but it will get better but you will not be able to see that yet…it’s just too soon…
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Mitzi1
Thank you for your kind and generous message to me. It’s now almost 3 weeks since losing my beloved to an horrendous death from cancer and I’m managing. I have limited support from a few people, but they are wonderful people. I went to church today and it was so emotive and it did offer me some solace. I know this isn’t for everyone. I read a book, about what happens when we die? Apparently the author says when we are wracked with grief our loved ones know and feel the loss of us too and that they come to us when we are asleep, apparently it’s an easier realm to reach us in. If we dream of our beloved departed it means they are visiting us? I don’t know how much of this is true, but it’s comforting to read. I’m crying every day and aching as I’m sure all of you on this site are. Each day rolls into another with no real purpose exempt to get through it to the next and so the endlessness of it all goes on and on. I do however believe that for all of us as time passes the agony of our individual losses will ease and we will remember our beloved lost soulmates in a more positive less painful way; until then our struggles continue. I comfort myself by reminding myself of the lessons John taught me in life and I ask him “ what would he do in my situation”? It isn’t a remedy but it hellos to keep a part of him alive. My prayers for you all. Lisa xxx
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I am sorry to you all for your loss.
It’s my 12 week . Like people say we are on the same path but also a different path. Your grief is your own and don’t let people tell you how you should feel. Please post on here if you need to. I have and it’s helped knowing i am not alone. Please look after yourselves. Take care and it is one step at a time. If you have a support network please use it.
I understand how you feel, its 21 weeks yesterday since I lost my beloved husband to cancer.
Im so sorry for your loss
@Westminster3west
Sounds as though your John n my John very similar.
My John was my calming influence who talked me so much in just two n half years. Most of all he talked me how to love unconditionally and he always said to me that he wanted me to grow wings n learn to fly…
He only wanted my happiness and I absolutely just wanted him to be happy and I know he was…
I ask him all sorts of things and ask his advice and when I’ve been in absolute depths of despair strange things have happened that make me believe or at the very least hope he’s with me…
Mitzi 1
Hello, how are you doing? Yes, my John was a very caring and supportive partner. Sounds like your John was also. Those men are very special. Today has been a terrible day, cried and cried and cried. Don’t know why today has been so hard. I’m not too bad when I’m outside it’s when I’m in the house. He died here in our home in the living room, which became a makeshift bedroom. How long have you been without your John? For me it’s almost a month. Feels longer somehow. Tell me does it, the grief, does it get easier? Lisa
@Westminster3west
It will be 8 weeks this Thursday when he just died in the ambulance…Cardiac Arrest was shouted but it wasn’t his heart that took him it was a DVT going to his lung
We’d been sat having breakfast and deciding what to do with our day and putting trainers on when he was suddenly struggling for breathe and sweating…
Life has been sucked out of me and I really do want to get back to some sort of normal because it’s what John would want me to do.
This week up to now has been very tearful.
@Mitzi1 @Westminster3west
My husband was also called John and I have been without him 3 and a half months. We also had a normal start to the morning, planned to go out that night, walked down the road and he collapsed and died of a blood clot to the lung. The very first few weeks were awful, just utter shock and disbelief. I manically went through loads of paperwork with my sister’s help so I didn’t have to think. Now I just feel a deep sadness for him, for the plans we had made, for my sons losing their dad. He was 65, never ill, such a shock. I met him in 1983 , he was my best friend. I just hope it gets easier in some way. So sorry for you both, for all of us on here xxxx
Mitzi1
Thank you. I will. I’m sorry for your loss too. 
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