Hello all.

Today has been my first day by myself in a very long time. My partner has gone to visit his family this Xmas and I had planned on cracking on with things. We are in the middle of moving into our new place & decorating.

But today I just… stopped. Slept in AND napped. Even getting out of bed to turn the heating off feels enormously difficult.

Since Gran/Dad died in September, I have had no days off at work (aside from one for the funeral & 2 in the days immediately following his death). I have done my best to stay busy even when I was at my brain foggiest. I’ve thrown myself into everything and anything from art to decorating.

And I can’t tell if today my body is just begging for some rest at last or if it’s the grief, or both. Either way, things are feeling very, very heavy today.

If you are able to and there is nothing you HAVE to do, i would say just go with it. Our bodies talk to us all the time - it tells us when it needs food/drink, when its in pain, and now it sounds like its telling you “no more - i need to rest!” Be kind to yourself, once youve rested thoroughly you might feel able to start doing some stuff, but actually all of that can wait. Give your mind and body some time to heal - thats more important.

You might find more emotions or thoughts come to the fore when youre still, and you might be tempted to get busy to avoid them, but just go with the flow, its all part of your mind trying to process whats happened. Take care of yourself x

1 Like

Hello @Ally6 .

I think you’re probably right. After I posted this I asked myself what I would say if a friend told me all of this & I realised I’d probably tell them they need to rest or take it easy for a bit.

In truth, the decorating I was planning on doing today can wait. My back has still not really recovered from the other days I’ve decorated, and since I’d be going over by myself… it’s probably wisest to take it easy.

Thanks for the message, Ally6. I think sometimes just writing things down can bring clarity to our thoughts & makes us confront what’s been staring us in the face for quite some time.

I also use that technique of asking myself “what would i say to a close friend if they had the same issue” -it always helps! Take care x


My sleep pattern is chaos ! I sleep typically 11 to 2 or 3 then fall asleep again after a couple of hours then I’m not waking until 9 or so.

My concentration is very variable too

1 Like

YES!! My concentration has improved a lot, but in the first few weeks after Gran/Dad passed every brain-intensive activity was a s t r u g g l e. I was teaching classes and trying to teach vocabulary and I’d be struggling for examples or simplified meanings (my students have English as their second or even third language)!

1 Like