Lost my beloved Mum 2 months ago and my uncle 4 months ago. Mum and I lived together and we very close. Although she was 94, her death in hospital was unexpected. She died on the day of discharge, whilst I was getting ready for her to come home. I cared for Mum, but she was fairly independent. We used to say that we were a team. I also liaised with all the services for my uncle, visited him, organised hospice care, did the shopping, etc. I arranged both funerals. During this time, I continued to work in a very demanding job. I have taken 2 months bereavement leave since Mum died as I knew that I would need the time emotionally. I feel like I am doing better emotionally than I thought I would. I think I still might not be processing it fully, or perhaps my body is protecting itself. Now 2 months later, I am absolutely ‘wiped out.’ I try to keep busy, but have aches and pains and I am exhausted. I now even have pain in 1 side of my jaw, which might be teeth grinding. I am sleeping and eating well. Mum always said that I do too much. I am 53 so querying whether this is perimenopause or grief. I don’t feel depressed. I want to keep going, but the exhaustion stops me. I’m going to try and secure a GP appointment next week, but they are difficult to secure. Is exhaustion a normal part of grief 2 months later? If so, how did other peoole manage day-to-day with it? I’m due back to work soon and not sure how I will manage early mornings and the demands of the job, whilst feeling so exhausted. I’m tired by 6.30pm. I can describe the exhaustion like when you have flu but without the cold symptoms.
Yes, I think exhaustion is absolutely normal. Your body and your mind have had to cope with so much. My husband died 4 months ago and I’m still exhausted most of the time. I’m lucky enough to be retired, so I can pace myself more easily, but still the exhaustion kicks in. I can’t advise you much about going back to work - I deon’t know what you do, but is it possible to ask if they can give you lighter duties while you adjust? It’s good that you’re planning to see your GP - he/she can probably make some useful suggestions. Sending you strength and rest. xx
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