Hi Everyone
I am really struggling at the moment and I don’t think I can do this life without my hubby. He passed away on the 1st September 2023. I thought I was really handling it. But on the 30 th of December was our 30th Anniversary and today is the 4th month of his passing. It only clicked last night that it’s a new year one that he will never live in and it’s broken me into pieces. I think I’ve been in denial up to now. He only got a pain in his side thought he’d pulled something 4 weeks later he’s dead. They found something I. His side but wouldn’t do an autopsy to find out what it was. Now it goes through my head , did I miss something, could I have saved him, why didn’t I stay longer that night.
I can’t sleep eat just cry.
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Hi rosey iam so sorry for your loss , there will be a lot of questions, that know one has the answers to , i lost my beautiful wife on the 31 of October 2023 I feel iam on a roller coaster of emotions, one day up nexted day down, take each day at time , but keep posting on this site every one will rally round you , take care rosey x
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Hi Rosey,
So sorry that you also find yourself here. I am new too but I have found support amongst us all so keep posting.
I lost my husband to Oesophageal cancer on 14th of November and I am also struggling. I cry every day and break my heart I know how difficult it is to lose a partner. Just put one foot in front of the other and try not to look to far ahead xx
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Thanks Paul
I really did think I was handling it. But knowing that I’ll never see hear hug kiss him ever again. It’s seems too much to take. I know it’s one step at a time to get through it. But I really don’t want to. We were always together 24/7 we had our own business. We worked hard and had just retired and purchased a run down bungalow to turn into our dream home. We were so excited. He thought he’d pulled a muscle putting up a shed. He went so quick and the not knowing what was in his side goes through my head on a loop.
I really hope I can get a good night sleep one day then I might think differently
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Hi Alice
So sorry for your loss. I wish they would have checked to see what was in his side then I probably could work it out in my head. But I don’t know.
I wish I could turn the clock back
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Hey @Rosey i just read your post. My husband was having treatment and they didnt know what it was either. Then did biopsy and found bladder cancer, too far gone and he only survived 6 weeks after that so i know how you feel how quick it is , what a shock it is and how you cant believe they have gone !! He was only 60 … ! I miss him so much , i loved him so much and my life is broken. We are all grieving on here so be assured youre in the right place ! Life can be so cruel and unfair !!! Xx
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I lost my husband same situation he had a pain in his side sent to a&e he had a blood clot but they also found out he had pancreatic cancer and it was to advanced to do anything 4 weeks later he was gone 2mor would of been 29yrs together people move on with their lives while your still dat in shock of how quickly ur life changed x
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@Rosey i feel your pain it was a sudden death which I feel myself is harder and takes longer to deal with just my opinion. My dad had a heart attack and was gone literally 15 minutes after I just spoke to him broke my heart it was so so hard. I cared for mum and watched her going downhill so it was a sweet relief for mum and her family as she was wasting away I grieved a lot while I was caring for her so it was much easier than when dad went. I still grieved them both but dads took longer. Mum has been gone 3 years and I still struggle dad has been gone over 20yrs. If we didn’t love 
we wouldn’t have so much pain. 
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Hello Rosey
I lost my husband age 58yrs in October 2023 different circumstances he had non Hodgkin lymphoma . Worked hard robbed of retirement and our future plans. I wanted to say that’s what really triggers me into overwhelming distress. Knowing I won’t see his face kiss him hold him smell him or hear his voice. It’s unbelievable isn’t it . 40th wedding anniversary would have been this year. I miss him 24/7 especially at night and early morning.
It’s that beginning and ending your day , heart breaking Rosey .
Many people share here similar challenges.
I hope knowing you’re not alone with this holds you with love.
No one understands this unless they themselves have lost their life partner/loved one.
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Yeh i totally agree with you. Mornings i find the worse tbh. Nights i can feel sad or cry but mornings … i sometines am in such a deep sleep that i wake up and i have forgotten he has gone and i jump, my body literally jumps. I hate it is such an awful feelng and cant believe 13 months in i still get this awful feeling. I was married for 35 years and with him for 37 … xx
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