Is anybody else struggling to understand siblings
My husband of 48 years died suddenly 11months ago from a heart attack.
I am struggling to understand my sister and brother . I thought we were reasonably close but I feel angry with them as to me they have been useless . The odd phone call . Very few visits (even though they are local) . No mention of my husband . Am I being unreasonable but I can’t help but be so very disappointed in them
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@Annie17 Yep, nothing will make you reevaluate a relationship more than going thru a crisis. Whose been amazing, whose been conspicuous by their absence etc. Makes you see them differently & tbf, it changes things. My experience is the opposite. One of my brothers, who I’m not that close to has been absolutely fantastic since my Dad died. From dropping everything to be with me, when I rang him from the hospital to tell him Dad was dying, to checking I was ok in the days that followed. Could you tell your siblings how you’re feeling & how their lack of empathy is making you feel? Perhaps they don’t know what to say so like many, avoid the topic.
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Seems to be a common theme with bereavement.
At first people don’t know what to say so avoid you . Then they expect you to be back to your ‘normal’ self after a few weeks/months .
They just don’t get it .
xx
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No youre not i had exactly same reaction with a brother snd sister too ! Its crazy and im furious with then !!! Xx
I had one brother who has been so good ! Helped me all the way along and still is … rest of em … huh !
15 weeks and it’s like mine have forgot it happened and that I’m still here most be a sibling thing
All I say one day the tables may turn
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Yeh its such a strange reaction isnt it ? I dont get it … ??? X
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It is never heard from my brother in over a month people are strange
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i know theyre weird arent they ? Strange reactions people have xx
Makes me feel better to know that I am not on my own re my siblings
Thanks everybody .
It’s like they have all moved on
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That’s what I think as well
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Same here my wife passed away last October funeral was November not had text call or anything from them since the funeral a very good friend of mine said they are nothing to do with me anymore the link with her family was her that link is now broken i want nothing to do with them do you agree with him ?
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The response of our siblings seems very strange to me … i dunno why they act like this but i would just ignore them and concentrate on yourself if i was you … cos we going through this awful grieving Xx
My brother keeps in touch. On holiday at moment. Unfortunately it is likely he will soon be joining this club. His wife has terminal ovarian cancer and us starting to decline. My sister in law also rungs regularly but doesn’t really understand. Suggested I get a cat.
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I think a cat would be nice for you @Pudding … and older one ? Maybe from a cat rescue ? They are very independent and don’t need a lot of care … i know it doesnt replace our husbands but it does help … i found that with my puppy xxx
I love cats. Had lots. Just not sure physically capable of looking after a cat at present. Also there is the cost. Probate won’t be cleared for 4 months.
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Maybe afterwards ? X
It would be nice to have one to stroke. We had two that used to sleep by our feet under the quilt and one that would sleep curled around the top if my head.
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Ha my puppy did that the other day … found her curled up on my pillow above my head lol x
It’s hurtful when they don’t understand.
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