Nearly six months in and completely numb, not feeling I am here physically and totally shell shocked.

The ‘in laws’ have turned their back and I have not seen them since the funeral. Dealing with this alone. I invited the ‘family’ here to share my wonderful husbands passing only to find out a sister recorded me having a meltdown in my own home. I fought all week to get my husband home after we were told he had two weeks to live, invited his family into our home to be with us and now…nothing! They left not even 24 hours after his passing and only returning for the funeral a week later. Even his step daughter has decided I am black widow and how dare I keep his possessions and ashes!

Other people just get on with their lives, false promises of help and they all just fade away to nothing. This is a weird place to be… people do not know what to say, my own children and family have never seen me this way and the loneliness and isolation is just insurmountable.
I feel alone in their sense of people, feel alone on my own and just do not fit with life anymore.
How do we find our way through this?

How on earth do we get through this?


I am very sorry for your loss.
I lost my dad 10 months ago, we cut off contact with countless family members, and there is a lot of anger that comes with that. Grief and loss is one way to see who is truly there and who is not, and sadly you will not forget or forgive those who fell short.
Be kind to yourself and patient with your feelings. Whatever you feel is valid, and I cannot apologise enough for the short comings of your family.


It sounds like you have had a really difficult time and I’m so sorry for all the pain you are going through.
Relationships often flounder and fail at a time like this and I understand the hurt that it feels when those people you hoped would support you let you down.
Try to start looking after yourself and focus on how you can be kind to yourself and just take it hour by hour at the moment.
Sending hugs and strength.


So very sorry.

Sadly, this is more common than we would like to think.

People can really surprise and shock us when someone dies.

If you can, I know it’s not easy, try to see this as their problem and a reflection of who they are.

Another difficult thing to do when you are hurting so much, is to concentrate on you.

The first thing I think you should remember is that you reached out to them and even though you were trying to cope you invited his family to be with him. That is a great credit to you.

Sending a big hug,

Rose x