It’s been 2 months now and I only seem to feel save in bed, I do force myself to get up and do something for a little while and feel anxious and go back to watching tv in bed, can anyone else relate to this and is it ok
1 Like
It’s strange , we only used to go to bed when we were tired , now I just wish the days away so I can go to bed and ( hopefully ) sleep to get some respite from feeling so lost.
2 Likes
100% relate. I wish I could push a pause button on life and just hide in the dark until I’m ready to come back out.
I’m giving myself permission to sleep as much as I can, when I don’t absolutely have to be somewhere. Essential functions only right now.
Sending hugs. You’re not alone 
2 Likes
Thank you for taking the time to reply, it is a comfort to know I’m not the only one who finds comfort being cocooned up,Do you think the act of grieving is just enduring the passage of time or is there something we are supposed to do people talk about the process but what does that mean
1 Like
I don’t think grief follows any particular rules - that’s one of the hardest things about it, I suppose. There’s no set pattern to follow, we’re all making it up as we go along.
For me it varies. Some days I feel like you said, enduring the passage of time until it eventually stops happening to me. Other days I feel like I can glimpse something like a brighter future. And other days I can’t see anything for the darkness.
I don’t know what other people mean when they talk about processing, but for me it just means allowing the feelings to come up and pass through me, without trying to suppress them or judging myself. I try to give myself space to ‘stare at the wall’ (doing the washing up, going for a walk, looking out the window) - to think whatever I need to think, feel whatever I need to feel. It’s not so much that you need to do anything in particular, just make room for that stuff to happen naturally.
And I also think it’s important to have breaks in between, doing things that are physical or social. I believe a lot of the work of processing is done at a subconscious level, so it’s good to give the conscious mind something to occupy itself so it can get out of the way.
I hope that helps. Whatever feels right for you is the right thing (probably nothing feels right, but maybe some things are a little closer to it than others).
Do your best to be kind and patient with yourself. You’re still breathing, and that’s all you need to do for now 
xx
1 Like