Fear of what next

Losing a sibling
1

My sister passed away unexpectedly on 3 February and I’ve got all sorts of feelings going on but one of the most overwhelming fears at the moment is that our parents are elderly (85 and 81) and both in poor health. I’m so scared that I’m going to lose my entire family this year - I know I’m being completely irrational and worrying about things that haven’t happened yet but I don’t have children and hate the thought of not having anyone with the same blood as me in the world. How crazy is that! I have an amazing husband who is very supportive but as this is a second marriage I can’t shake the feeling that he’s only there while he wants to be - poor bloke would be so upset if he knew I was thinking like this.

I fear being alone in this world. There I have said it. Daft as me and my sister didn’t see each other regularly and fell out last summer because our parents were both in hospital (mum from May - October) and she didn’t visit once.

So why when I didn’t rely on her when she was alive so I fear her absence so much in her death?

It’s really helped being able to put this into words on here.

2 Likes
2

Hello @Bongobear,

I’m Seaneen and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how scared you are feeling. I am glad that writing it down has been helpful for you.

I’m so sorry to hear about your sister. Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that might be helpful.

You might also want to read our support page on Losing a sibling.

I really hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support and I also hope you feel you can access more support should you need it.

Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.

Take care,

Seaneen