Feel bereft

My husband died 5 weeks ago. I’m utterly devastated and feel like my life has no point anymore. He was 59 and about to retire. I can’t believe I’ll never see him again and every time I come home it hits me that he’ll never be there again. The ache is unbearable and I feel I could just breakdown at any moment. How do we get through this?


I Lost my husband to terminal cancer 5 months ago,so i feel your pain ,You are very early with your grief ,the only thing i can say is just take one day at a time,so sorry for your loss.

I’m so sorry for the loss of your husband @Sunseeker
I lost my husband who was 56 almost 4 months ago and he was also about to retire.
It is so hard especially when you lose all your future plans, dreams and hopes and at the moment it will all feel so painful and raw.
Just try to take a day at a time, or an hour if need be. Don’t think too much about the future and be kind ti yourself. Try rest when you can and eat as well as you can. Grieving is exhausting.
Try lean in those who can support you and keep posting on here - it can be a great support as we all truly understand your pain and heartache.
Sending a hug and strength for you xx

1 Like


I am so sorry for your loss. It’s difficult grieving. I have been drawing strength from others on this community and it’s always positive to hear from members who are much further along in their grief journey.

I lost mine 3.5 weeks ago. It’s painful and I’m just taking one hour at a time. I’m finding it’s helpful I set out wee tasks for myself every day. Before I got to bed, I write in my diary tasks for the next day what I will do.

Doesn’t have to be too taxing. Today my list is to wash and dry my hair, put a clothes wash on, dry the wash, Hoover, go to the shop to pick up milk. Mundane but it really has helped me doing this.

Keep sharing your feelings on here.

1 Like

So sorry @Sunseeker. Tomorrow will be 9 months since I lost my partner. I don’t really remember much about the first few weeks, and it amazes me to have got this far. At first you just try to get through each hour, and then each day. As Zana says, it’s the mundane stuff that helps. Nine months ago I was running out of shops in tears because I couldn’t bear to be shopping for one. Today I enjoyed choosing a few ‘treat’ foods for the weekend from M&S. It’s a hard, slow journey, but each tiny step - even doing the washing - is a positive, and even though a lot of days are still bad, there are good ones too.

Thank you for the replies. It’s just good to know I’m not the only one going through this devastating situation, but also so sad for everyone that we are.

1 Like

I am 56 lost my husband died suddenly age 65 , 12 weeks ago , he was going to retire next February when he was 66 but he was working till he died , I can’t believe I am 12 weeks down the line , I am going through life’s motions now that’s about it x