I’ve sound since the loss of my best friend others were full of, “if you need anything just ask.” I’ve found though when I have they’ve not been there generally. I get they have their own lives & people are busy but it makes me feel more isloated & alone. If i’m asked how are you, as long as I say i’m ok that’s all good. If i’m not & start to say why the subject tries to get changed or it’s like it’s belittled some how.
Hi @Scamp1 - so sorry to hear of your loss. You’re not the only one to find yourself like this after a bereavement. I found that after my partner’s funeral a lot of friends & neighbours took a step back. It’s almost like they think that you’re able to resume normal service after the funeral, but that’s not the case. (I’m lucky to have other friends and family who are there and keep an eye on me). I don’t think a lot of people are comfortable talking about loss, death, feelings, sadness etc and whilst we want to talk we can’t always find someone to really listen and understand. There’s a lot of support on these forums and there are a couple of zoom meetings a week (not official Sue Ryder ones but they’re run by members of this forum). If that interests you drop a pm to @KarenF for more info. In the meantime I hope you find these forums useful - they’ve been a great help to me. Best Wishes
Hi, thanks for your reply & the zoom info. Yes i do understand that people find it hard to know what to say & sometime i just wish they’d l8sten without offering advice. Especially the classic one of, oh you know they’d want you to carry on & or be happy etc. I do know that but at times that doesn’t help cos i’m upset & missing my friend & sometimes struggle to see a life beyond it at that moment in time. Not sure how to do a pm on here yet. I’ll have to try & work that one out.
@scamp1 To pm click on your avatar at the top of the screen (the S in the circle next to the Donate button). Select the envelope, 2nd from right, double click and scroll down and click on the Blue New Private Message box. Fill in the user name (eg @karenF) type your message then click private message at the bottom. That’s the way I did it when I started here - I’m sure someone will tell us if there’s an easier way.
Ok that’s great, thank you.