Feel so bad

Hi yesterday I went out for a couple of drinks with my oldest friend
I haven’t seen her for 18 months
A man bought us a drink we knew nothing about
We thanked him had abit conversation
We were just about to leave and he asked for me number I told him absolutely not a chance
I have cried all day today I feel like a have betrayed my husband even though I didn’t give him my number
That’s the last time I am going out

Thanks for listening
Marie x

Marie, you did nothing wrong. I know it must have come as a shock as we never thought of other people as being anything other than friends / acquaintances/ people met in passing before we lost our loved ones. This man obviously saw the qualities in you that you have. He was taking a chance. You said no as that’s not what you want. You have nothing to feel guilty about!


@Dotty666 hi Marie you have not betrayed your husband all you did was talk to the guy with your friend so please don’t beat yourself up over it pauline once told me if she went first she would want me to be happy even if that meant moving on with someone else my response to her was I don’t want anyone else and for me there will never be anyone else she is my heart and soul we are all suffering enough so please don’t feel bad you did nothing wrong stay safe take care sending hugs

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Hi Jules
Thank you so much for your reply
It’s made be feel better

Marie x

Hi Casey
Hope you ok as ok as you can be
Thankyou for your reply and advice it means alot
Marie x

Oh Dotty666
Bless you, you did nothing to provoke this,…
Please be gentle on yourself, you don’t need to worry yourself about such trivial things,

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Hi Dotty.
We are all so different in grief. I loved my husband more than life itself but I went on a date 5 months after he died. Don’t ask me why. I just wanted someone to end my pain in whatever way possible. He was a lovely guy but it didn’t take me long to realise he was not my Ron and that was that.
Grief is all consuming but we just have to go with it in whatever way it engulfs us.
Please don’t lock yourself away.

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Hi foggy
So sorry for your loss
You right I shoudnt worry nothing happened
I have spent all morning at Ian’s grave telling him I’m sorry and no one ever ever will replace him ever


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You haven’t betrayed your husband, you’ve done nothing wrong. So don’t beat yourself up.
I know how you feel, I thought about trying the dating game again a few weeks back but I felt so guilty for just thinking about it.
I had a long talk with my wife before she died and she told me I had to grab the chance of happiness if it comes my way but I honestly can’t see it happening as I just feel that I’d be cheating on her.

It’s hard isn’t it - we’re all so used to being part of a loving couple, that’s what we want. Problem is, the ideal person isn’t here and no one else measures up and / or we feel guilty!

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Hi, please, don’t stop going out, there is no reason for guilt, he asked, not you, and you said no. My late partner, said that after she had gone, I was to go out and have a life, because she had stopped me having one. Silly girl, of course she didn’t. But back to you, its hard but we have to get through, don’t lock yourself away.

Hi @Dotty666, as others have said, you did nothing wrong. I think we get sent people from our lost loved ones to help us on this journey. Don’t know if this makes any sense? I can count numerous times things have happened to me and strangers have helped.
Please do go out, I’m sure your lost loved one would want you to. We have to make the best sense of this world that we can, without them.

Thank you Pete
I’m so sorry for your loss.
I really appreciate your advice

Take care
Marie x

Hi Dotty please dont lock yourself away. You have done nothing wrong. Take care xx

Thank You Marie x

Thankyou foggy x