We buried my 42 year old husband today after him taking ill and going downhill so rapidly in hospital 18 days ago. I just think what do I do now? I am lucky that I live with our daughters 14 & 22 who are a great support and we all get comfort from one an other. We just have this huge empty void in our lives now our home feels so empty 
.
Any advice from someone who knows what we’re feeling would be much appreciated.
you just have to take each day as it comes sadly,be there for each other,and know that crying and feeling very emotional is all part of the grieving process.you will find a way,i can only say im here and alive and existing.be there for your daughters and be kind to your self.
it will not be easy ,far from it,just know that people on this site will offer comfort and support when they can.
regards
ian
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Hi jooles,
You got through today, you will feel empty and absolutely exhausted of all the emotions, and Just getting through today will have left you feeling drained. I remember thinking what do I do now, all the arranging the funeral and everything else kept my mind busy then once it’s over that’s when it truly hit me.
As everyone says just take it a day at a time and keep each other strong, you’ll find all sorts of emotions , and disbelief of it all for a while to come.
Cry , scream, shout talk about him, curl up and sleep do whatever you feel, you and your children will need each other more than ever.
keep posting on here it will help you
Thinking of you xx
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Thank you it’s just good to talk to people who truely understand the hurt and pain. At times this still seems surreal but we do get the strength to get through each day although it’s really tough x
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Glad you got through today Jools, now the hard work begins trying to bring some normality back for your kids while knowing life will never be the same again. Its early days yet and you will get there even though you can’t comprehend it at the moment. Come on here when you need some support especially on bad days.
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We all understand, the lovely people on here have got me through, it will get you through too x
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Just got to take 1 day at a time that’s all we can do. Life just so unfair at times and it’s hard trying to understand why do these awful sad things happen
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Hi Jools
I am truly sorry to hear about your husband. The shock of losing someone so young and suddenly is indescribable but many of us on this site have been in a similarly distressing position. The fact that you have arranged and attended your husband’s funeral will seem surreal , as though this can’t be your life.
My husband died suddenly last November and I still find it impossible to believe he is not coming back.
Your daughters will sustain you even in your darkest moments and you in turn will support them . At the moment you won’t know how but you will.
My two adult sons were distraught at losing their dad to whom they were exceptionally close but in the midst of their own grief they have kept me going. I wanted to give up but seeing their distress made me realise I couldn’t add to it.
You will find so much support on this site. I don’t know where I would be without it.
Thinking of you and your girls.
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Thanks Jobar
Like you my kids are keeping me going. I have to get out of bed for them every day. If I didn’t have my kids I would struggle to get out my bed I think.
This pain is still so raw. As we’re still not completely sure how my husband passed away still waiting on further testing which is going to be 6-9 months away I feel we won’t have complete closure till then. It’s just all so difficult.
One day at a time. Feelings can change in mins/hours actually. I lost my husband last year. Sudden death, It was a massive shock. He was 55 and died at work.
Life has changed so much without him. I miss him from the minute I open my eyes, my children are married so I live alone after 33 years together I have 2 small dogs for comfort. My children/grandchildren have been a blessing but their struggling a lot too especially our son:cry: I just take a day at a time , tomorrow isn’t guaranteed! My husband kept going GPs telling them he didn’t feel right, they never picked up on it , so he died at place of work! The inquest was awful. A whole day of listening to events leading up to his death. Nearly Broke me mentally . I can’t say it gets easier as I thought I was coping well but it feels so raw still, what happened. Keep strong your children will be good company. I hope their coping ok. Xxxxxxxxx Life really is so fragile
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Hi Karen
Thank you for replying to me. I am sorry for your loss .It is very hard but like you I am just taking one day at a time. That’s all I feel I can do. I am lucky that I live with our daughters although I understand they have their own lives and would never hold them back.
I feel I am passed the shock feeling of Mark’s sudden passing but then sometimes think how could this of happened to him?
Since Mark died I feel I have lost a lot of motivation with doing things in the house. My ironing pile is getting out of control ! I’m managing to get all the practical phone calls etc done as I know how important they are so I suppose at least that’s something xx
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Just get up and go with it, that’s all I do, I don’t make too many plans as each day is different. I’m making sure I go a long walk every afternoon/evening to try clear my head and walk the dogs. Xxxx love to you and your daughters. Keep strong. Xx
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