Feel totally lost miss my daughter

Losing a child
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I feel totally shit. My daughter passed away at the young age of 7 no warning happened very suddenly I don’t know how I am going to live my life without her by my side. My heart aches for her I just want to give her a big cuddle and a kiss.
I can’t believe she is gone and I don’t even know why not that it will change anything as the outcome will be the same. She was my sunshine and happiness the heart has been ripped out of our home it’s now just silent surrounded by toys that can no longer be played with I really hate life.

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Hello @Moana,

I’m so sorry to hear about your daughter. It sounds as though things are very difficult at the moment and you are feeling hurt.

I’m glad that you’ve been able to share how you are feeling here and I hope that you find the community a good source of support. Everyone here has experienced the loss of a loved one and will understand some of what you are going through.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that may help you right now.

Another good place to get support is Child Bereavement UK which supports families with the loss of a child - 0800 02 888 40 http://www.childbereavementuk.org/

Take care - keep reaching out,

Alex

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Hi mona , so sorry to hear of your loss of your daughter , she was so young and it must be terrible for you , im not really sure what to say but try and take one day at a time , try to do a little each day , your memorys will always be there , try to think of happy moments , there will be tears , lots of them , i lost my 38 year old daughter feb 2022 and its very difficult , she left behind 6 chikdren , all girls and 2 grandsons 1 year old and 2 year old , her children were 21, 15 14, 13, 5 , and one wasnt even 1 year old when she passed and they all been split up beacause there were 3 fathers , its been a terrible 15 months dealing with it all , we miss our daughter like crazy and i break down often , maybe you could see a doctor to arrange some councillng , nothing in this world will ever take your daughters place but you prob need help to get through it , ive been partially lucky as ive got my oldest daughter who has been very supportive even though shes been grieving herself and i have 2 sons , i can only wish you well in the future , i know its hard but if you havent got support i would say surround yourself round people you can talk to or see if a doctor has any ideas , all the best for now paul

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Hi tapps
Thank you for replying to my post. I’m sorry for the loss of your daughter also this world is just cruel you never expect to outlive your child. I feel angry and at the moment all I can think about are all the things my daughter is going to miss out on she was so happy and such a character I just miss her every second of the day and feel empty inside. I have a good family and people to talk to but nobody can understand possibly the pain and how you are feeling I just wish it was me who died instead. I feel like she’s been stolen from me she was at school day before the next day gone I just can’t get my head around it snd we don’t have any answers yet every morning I wake up and think why why her. Thanks for the advice it does help to use this platform as only people on her can possibly understand what you are going through which is hell.

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Hi moana , i know exactly how your feeling , sane with my daughter , here on the thursday and gone on friday , complete shock out the blue as there were known symptoms and no test in hospital proved anything wrong , after she passed they found out it was a blood clot and it went down as deep vein thrombosis , total shock , and no you dont expect to out live your child nor did it ever enter my head it would happen and i said exact same thing as you , i wished it had been me and not our gem (gemma) and how much shes going to miss out on and her children , my daughter was also happy and had a bubbly personality and your exactly right no one can possibly know how it feels even though ive had a couple of horrible comments from people since she passed , ( like , i think its time for you to move on now ) , life can be very cruel but i really hope thongs can improve for you , its easy said i know but in our hearts we know we have no other choice but we can do this , just little steps at a time , thinking of you x

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Hi tapps
The world is so cruel it just hurts so much. Gemma sounds like a lovely woman it’s hard to get your head around the fact they are gone. Thanks for replying to my post.

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You poor darling. I can’t imsgine how terrible you must feel. We lost our youngest daughter at 31 4 years ago and the pain was horrendous. I can only say to you that nobody understands the pain and loss like we do on this site. Keep posting as someone is always going to be here to talk to you.
Sending love and hugs.
Kate xx

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Hi Kate , not quite sure who your replying to as I get a bit confused on this site but thankyou anyway , and so sorry for your loss also , I’m still struggling and we have had so much added to the mix and we feel so dragged down right now, still dealing with an inquest , it all seems so slow , at the same time we have gone for guardian ship of one of Gemma’s daughters as she now has no mum or dad , as he is a bit of a troublesome person , so social services are putting us through the mill to get guardianship , totally unfair as she is our granddaughter , we have had to be dbs checked , got medicals coming up and been interrogated inside out , I’m hoping this time next year we are sorted out and that we can get on with the rest of our lifes without anymore hassle , sorry to rant on , just so frustrated with everything right now , all the best for now and I hope you get through the days as best as you can . Paul

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Hi i was replying to Moana.
Thankyou though for your kindness also.
None of us wanted to be here talking to each other but here we are. I have been part of another thread here for 3 and a half years. Helped me so much.
Love to you.
Kate x

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Also hope everything gets resolved for you. Our daughter had a. Wee girl who was then just 3 and a half. Thankfully her partner is amazing and is bringing Brooke up on his own. We are the only real family he has apart from his brother as his parents split years ago and his Dad lives in Texas with his new wife. They were over last week but seem to think taking them.out for dinner every night is being supportive. They havent been over since the funeral August 2019!
Sending love and hugs.
Kate x

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Thankyou Kate , sorry I jumped in , I did say I get confused on this site :joy: , there are some funny weird people in this world who haven’t a clue how to handle things and say and do all the wrong things without a clue of what there doing wrong , I have had what are supposed to be 2 of my friends say to me , I think it’s time you moved on now , that comment hit me hard both times , strangely enough there not connected as such , not a couple, but they both have no children and obviously no heart , I’ll never recover from the loss of my daughter , the only thing I’ve got to be greatful for is I’m nearly 65 so not bundles of years left , I believe in the after life and hope I can meet gem again , all the best Kate Paul .

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Hang in there. This life is a gift. We are here to carry on for some reason. We all need to make it matter as our beautiful children would have wanted us to do.
Much love, Kate x

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Hi Lisa_s_mum
I really miss my daughter so much she really was my whole world and feel like she has been snatched away from me I know life is a gift and I must carry on I just don’t know how I’m going too without her I feel trapped on this earth. I’m so sorry for your loss also and thanks for your message x

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It will be so hard for you just now. When Lisa was a baby she got double viral pneumonia. It was touch and go but she survived and consequently i fed her till she was 3 and a half as she wasn’t a great eater. I just wanted to give her a chance. Well it paid off till puberty when she had her first lung collapse. After surgery she seemed well till she was pregnant and it all reared up again. Lung fibrosis. Really quite bad but she had Brooke and was doing really well till she picked up a virus on holiday in Majorca. The beginning of the end really. 8 weeks on life support. I think i died myself so many times over those weeks. Shattered. Shocked. Angry. Guilty. You name it, I felt it. Our eldest, her sister was devastated. We all were, are, in fact.
You had so little time with your baby girl. Its just so infair. I have no words to help you as nothing really seems to be right. Just know that we here all really understand your pain and the love we share here is a great help.
Much love, Kate xx