My only daughter died suddenly on March 7th, She has left two girls aged 12 & 14 (my granddaughters). Just had her funeral a few day ago but I don’t seem able to cry or grieve as I would have expected to. I’m going to lose my grandchildren soon as they are going to live with their Dad in another part of the country so contact will be limited. Why am I not breaking down and doing what I would have expected? It’s the worst tragedy ever to happen to me - yet I feel strangely calm/numb/unfeeling
Dear Patsy, I’m so sorry about the loss of your daughter, I think you are in shock, it’s such a pity your grandchildren are going to move away from you, as I’m sure they are a great comfort to you, probably the reality will hit you then, I do hope you have support around you for when you need it, we all grieve differently, nobody is the same, please be kind to yourself, sending love and hugs Jude xx
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So sorry for your loss Patsy. I think numbness is a natural response to death because of the enormous shock. It is a way of allowing your body to cope. Whenever I used to attend a funeral I could never understand how the wife or husband of the deceased did not cry when I was sometimes heartbroken. But when my Ron died I calmly ironed the clothes he would be wearing and I got through the funeral without a tear. I kept looking at the hearse as we drove to the crem and I kept thinking ‘My whole life is in there’ so why am I not crying? I realise now though that I was living in a blur even for a year afterwards. We are all individuals in grief and that is so true. You loved your daughter with all your heart and that is all that matters. I send you love and hugs and please believe that there is nothing wrong with you. X
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Made the edit for you Angiejo1.
Take care,
Audrey,
Online Community Team