So sad. So sudden. Anticipatory grief leads us to believe we know how it is going to play out. But death is rarely compliant and leaves us shell shocked.
We are similar in age, my husband died 6 weeks ago from an ongoing illness.
I thought I was prepared - I am not !
@KarenF No Karen I have to do something I just cannot go on like this. I will end up topping myself lol. And instead of taking care of my Sue I can take care of someone who needs it. Someone who has been through hell and needs a new Temporary home. It maybe my last chance to find a little peace without my Sue its all I can think of I am no good alone and used to looking after someone. It may come to nought because I am 69 now but I need someone now my sues gone but rest assured I will still be on here. Hope you find want you need hun talk soon Dave.
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@Dave13 I can understand that as the need to feel needed is strong in me too. My younger daughter certainly needs me plus I volunteer at a craft group, run an exercise class for older people, I’m helping clear out the house of a friend who died 18 months ago and I try to help on here. Yes, all this helps me too.
I do hope they don’t think your grief is a reason not to accept your offer of a placement.
Love
Karen xxx
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@Susie3021.
Sorry for your loss. My wife died suddenly after spending 6wks in hospital, thankfully peacefully in her sleep. Take each day as it comes, grief comes in waves. It is a struggle at times and emotions are over the place.
Take care
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RussellE
I am so very sorry for your loss ,the grief is overwhelming losing a loved one ,
Thank you for your kind words,
I’m so glad I found this group as everyone is so kind and know the struggle we are dealing with ,
It was such a shock,the way I lost my husband to a cardiac arrest while driving,
Take care of yourself
Kind Regards
Sue
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Dave13
Let me know how it goes wishing you all the best,
Take care
Sue
@Susie3021 @KarenF Hi just got back it went well but with it only being 9 weeks since my Sue passed to leave it a couple of more weeks and they will be back in touch fingers crossed. Feel a little 
But thats life .
Hi there Angelalouisa
How well you have exlained anticipatory grief. I have never seen it written so well.
I also knew for a few years that I could lose my husband and when he deteriorated in his last weeks I knew that the time had come and thought I was strong enough to get through it. How wrong I was and watching someone you love fade away in front of you is gut wrenching and pure torture. I also thought I had prepred myself.
xx
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Dave13
Sounds promising, and gives you more time to get sorted
Fingers crossed it all works out for you
Take care
Sue
I so understand what you are saying my husband battle with cancer for a year and a half and to be told he only had 6 months left was so hard .As i knew one day i would lose him and i also watch him deteriorate was the hardest thing i have ever had to do i thought i was prepred but in the end i just fell apart
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@Susie3021 I know but the last 9 weeks have been bad for me. And will continue to be. I need something to alter or someone to lookafter. I need to fill this empty void inside of me where my heart used to be before it grows and engulfs me.
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Hi Sue
I do understand but when they dismissed my husband as a lost cause, I refused to give up and he lived for many years more than was expected by changing so many things with our diet/lifestyle. I was so greatful he had a good quality of life for so long and there was no way we was going to let anyone tell us how long he had as he was so determined for so long. We was so thankful for each year we had. But like everyone else on this forum the loss becomes devastating and we have to face so much we never expected.
I am over three years into my loss and there does come a day when we can face up to our loss a little better. It never goes away but somehow we do manage to find a life that we can fit into. Like so many I have had all the ups and downs and tried to adapt to doing different things but now I am happy enough with my life and doing my old and trusted interests.
Good luck
xx
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Dave13
I do a lot of walking ,and i look after my mother try to keep busy
Maybe consider having a dog they are great company ,
I know how you feel ,i miss my husband so much ,i was only 19 when i met him ,
I sometimes wonder how i have survived ,it does feel like a bad nightmare ,
You have something to look forward to helping a ukraine family ,
Take care and everyone is on here to help each other
Sue
Chemus
My husband passed March 10, 2023. He was 56 years young and was sudden and unexpected. I feel your pain. I’m crushed. I don’t know where to start. Crawling in ball and dying is how I feel. I’m overwhelmed with grief.
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SharonB
So very sorry for your loss ,
Know how you feel lost my husband October 2022 suddenly ,
Take care big hugs
Sue
Its so hard i lost my husband 5 months ago and it hurts so much its so hard watching a love one suffer so much and i hate hospital so much they do not seem to care anymore take care of yourself xx
Susie3021
Thank you. Does it get any easier?
Sue11
My husband died sudden. We went on a cruise early to mid Feb celebrating our anniversary. I’m just shocked.
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SharonB
I hope it will get better ,it’s only 5 Months so still feel like a bad nightmare,
I walk ,I visit my husband grave and play his favorite songs ,this is my way of dealing with my Grief,
My husband cousin has been brilliant with me ,
As most of his family has passed away,
I go shopping with her and sometimes out for a meal ,
My son lives over a 5 hours drive from me so difficult
Take care of yourself,and hopefully it will get easier for us all in this group,
I find everyone supportive on here and so glad I found this group
Big hugs
Sue
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My heart goes out to you even though i knew my husband only had 6 months left it must have been so hard for you please take care of yourself xx