Feeling lost in life after losing both of my parents young

Losing a parent
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Hey everyone!
I’m feeling really lost in life at the moment, I’m a woman approaching my late twenties and I’m now more than ever really struggling without my parents and accepting the fact I have to live the rest of my life without them. My Mum committed suice and my Dad died 2 years after her from cancer. Both absolutely broke me in different ways but I feel like losing my Dad really put me in the mindset of thinking ‘what next’ and just kind of being ready for terrible things to always happen to me. Life is so so cruel. I was so close with both of my parents and I think the last 5 years since losing them I’ve really struggled to accept it and now I finally am.

I’m single and all my friends are in relationships and loneliness has really set in lately. I have my brother but he is also in a relationship and we are very different people. I have amazing friends but no one can really relate to me in the sense of losing someone so close to them like parents. I find that with dating and relationships it always reverts back to I have too much baggage for someone and I’ve been through too much for people. I struggle to keep relationships/dating.

I guess what I’m wanting to know is how any of you in simiar situations cope with this, and I guess I’m just looking for someone I can relate to that would like to chat.

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I think the problem you have is probably the same as mine. Yes you will have a connection with people, but you won’t have that special connection you had with your parents, that’s tough. It’s almost like being a child again and wanting that love or a hug or a shoulder to cry on or that loving support. It’s very hard to find,. I feel it the most at the moment due to health issues.

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That’s so true Keith, it’s like you crave the unconditional love that really is only shared fully with family.

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I know, was recently I will never fully recover from losing mum. Just go through the days 1 by 1. Not a lot else I can do really.

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Life is cruel, it’s true :pensive:. Do your parents have siblings? Do they live here or in NZ?

I think that the right person will understand that what you’ve been through has changed you, and theyll stand by you. My mum lost her parents when she was 15. In her 20s she met my wonderful dad, and I’d say that she did have unresolved trauma, but he stuck by her side.

:yellow_heart:

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That’s such a lovely story about your Mum and your Dad and I too agree the right person will understand.

My parents do have siblings but I struggle to feel as connected with them as I’d like to as we lived in New Zealand for so long, I missed out on a propper relationship with them until the last 5 years, but I’m still really lucky to have them.

Thanks for your message xx

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