Hello ,
My daughter, my best friend , was diagnosed with cancer a year ago , she fought really hard but sadly left us 4 weeks ago 1 month after her 21st birthday , for the past year we’ve been absorbed in each other, hospital appointments and treatments we did manage some nice times too and I cared for her at home right up until the end - now I just don’t know what my purpose is I feel lost , I walk for miles usually by the sea but this week has been the hardest so far - I go from being sad and crying to very angry and resentful and even jealous.
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Hello @Dooks21,
I can see that you’re new to the community. I hope you find it to be a support to you, but I am so sorry for the loss of your daughter that brings you here. It sounds like you shared a lot together and that you’re understandably feeling lost, angry and resentful. Everything you’re feeling is completely valid.
@Charlie75 has also posted recently about feeling lost after the loss of their daughter, so you may want to connect.
I wanted to share some sources of support that might help you right now:
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Child Bereavement UK support families with the loss of a child. They also support bereaved children. You can call their helpline on 0800 02 888 40.
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The Compassionate Friends support families who have lost a child of any age. They have a grief companion scheme where you can get 1-1 support from another bereaved parent. You can call them on 0345 123 2304.
Thank you again for sharing - please keep posting if it helps, and remember that you are not alone.
Take care,
Harriet
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Hi I recently lost my daughter and yesterday had her special day. The day was totally overwhelming with people being turned away as we were at full capacity in the building over 400 people attended, she was just 22 and touched so many people. I feel totally the same as you lost resentful angry. There are no words, the loss is immense the heart in a trillion pieces. I try hard to do one task a day washing sitting outside if weather permits or going for a walk. I keep telling myself that no one or anything will ever be able to hurt my precious girl again and I get a tiny bit of comfort knowing she will never feel pain or hurt. I keep a journal and have been writing in it every day it helps a little.
Keep strong reach out we are here for each other. 
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Dear Dooks, I am so sorry to hear about your daughter.It must be the worst thing that can happen to someone. Your feelings are quite normal, my wife died on Christmas day after two years of cancer treatments and the pain was unbearable even though I had two year to prepare, it still destroyed me.
I found walking to be my best therapy. It helps reduce anxiety and being tired at the end of the day helps with sleep.
I attended a bereavement group which also helped and posting on this site was very useful. I hope you find some solace here
Wishing you all the strength you will need
Tom
Good morning Charlie, I am glad you managed to get through your special day for your daughter. It must have been lovely to have so many people wanting to show their love for her.
I hope you find the strength you need now to look after yourself. I’m sure your daughter is watching over you now and looking after you.
Wishing you all the best
Tom
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Thank you so much, today is a hard day lots of crying and emotions. X
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I’m so sorry for your loss, those feelings of sadness and despair are overwhelming, your daughter was so young too. If you have other family lean on them as . You need their support. Some people say being outside, walking or just sitting in the sunshine helps a little. I haven’t lost a child. It was my partner eight months ago. There really were no words to describe how I felt. I expect you are the same. Grief rips your heart out. Take care and post again on here, it definitely helps.
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Thank you so much to you all for your reply’s , I’m so sorry your all going through difficult times but I feel a bit of comfort knowing that the feelings I’m experiencing are ok ( of that makes sense ) X
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Tom , I’m so sorry what an awful expedience, cancer is the absolute worst isn’t it , We managed to get a celebration for my daughter for her 21st not what the original plan was but I’m thankful for that I walk most day I’m lucky I live near the coast so the sea is a comfort , thank you for sharing
Nikki
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Good morning Dooks, I am pleased to see you posting. I’m sure talking about how you are feeling helps to cope with the pain.
Wishing you a peaceful Sunday
Tom
It’s been 2 weeks since we had her celebration and I can completely relate , the journal is a good idea I think I’ll try that thank you x
Hi Nikki, the pain and suffering from cancer is terrible. My wife made friends with a lot of younger women while having her treatments as she use to teach young adults she got on well with them. Unfortunately all of them except one have died many in their twenties and thirties.
Wishing you all the best
Tom
