@gazza1 yeah I feel like this and I’m on the 14th month . I’m heartbroken and also I suffer from feelings of anger, anxiety and I’m terribly indecisive. It’s awful not having someone to make decisions with I find . This is a biggie for me because I often don’t make sound decisions and tend to be impulsive. It’s very difficult losing the special person in your life knowing they’re gone forever xxx
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Its been 4 months now. She was just 57
My soulmate my life. Lost and broken
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Thats not very long you know. Be patient with yourself x
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Hi deb5
I am trying to be. Tried counselling, exercise, eating properly, trying to keep busy but nothing can change whats in your heart and head. I cant go on like this,i know that much. Im tryi g to be strong for my son and daughter and grandchildren and my brother who has just started chemo again. He has stage 4 prostate cancer. Life is so cruel. I just hope there is something after this life. This cant be it. Thank you for caring,means a lot to know there are people out there who understand
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Same for me 4 months I’m 57 he was 55 
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So cruel. There are no words that describe the pain 
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Hi debbie66
Im so sorry. Is that a form of cancer?
Not heard of it before
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@Deb5 @gazza1 @Debbie1966 very sadly there’s a lot of us just in this thread who have lost our soulmates at a young age . We all seem to be experiencing loss at the same stage of life . For all of us it’s dreadful isn’t it - personally I don’t have any interest of trying to start again with someone new , but losing your soulmate age 58 leaves an awful lot of lonely years ahead doesn’t it . Take care xxx
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Its too painful. Im sorry for your pain, really am because no one should feel like this. Maybe we can all help each other through
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Ye he was diagnosed with brain cancer a Glioblastoma grade 4 inoperable. We was on a fabulous holiday in August he was fine then coming back he went back to work but wasn’t the same was tired started bumping into things he was diagnosed in September and he passed beginning of December
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Omg thats awful, im so sorry. My wife had a colonoscopy which resulted in scans that diagnosed bowel cancer that had spread to her liver. Chemo followed but she just got weaker and weaker
My heart goes out to you.
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Message anytime you need a chat
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Same applies to you.
By the way how do you put your picture on this?
Good morning everyone. Love and strength to you all for another day to negotiate.
I too am feeling utterly lost. Having a really tough time at the moment. More tearful than I have ever been. No idea why it’s suddenly so much harder again. I think it’s the loneliness is just so overwhelming.
Strangely the anger emotion has gone the other way for me. I used to be quite feisty, and have strong opinions on things that I wasn’t afraid to show. Always the one with loudest voice at staff meetings etc
Now I feel void of all that. Nothing really makes me angry or cross, because nothing else matters any more because he worst thing has happened.
And on the other side, I used to be the most optimistic , hopeful person I knew. It’s what pulled us through 7 years of my husbands illnesses, and me being his carer 24/7 for the last few years ( while still working )
Maybe now I’m just so full of sadness there literally isn’t any room for any other emotions.
Sorry for my sad post, but thank you for the fact that this is literally the only place we can be honest with each other.
Love, hugs and strength to you all
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Yeh i know how you feel … i met up with some ladies on here last friday and boy it was great getting those emotions out. We had a meal and were talking for.hours. It was so good. Is there anyone near you that you can meet up with who also lost a partner ? Or a bereavment group … it really helps to speak to other people in person about what we are going through … as well as on here too. You dont have to explain it to them… they already understand you see xx
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Thanks @Deb5
I have tried looking for groups, but they all meet up during working hours, and I still am needing to work full time. And I haven’t noticed anyone on here who lives near me. (Southampton)
So I continue just to find help and comfort in this site. Thank you all of you.
19 months on Sunday 
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You might need to travel a bit but well worth it i think … i really enjoyed it anyway … you do get days that are worse than others for sure 
xx
Hi John80. I sympathise with you. I lost my darling wife Bev in February 2022 after nearly 50 years together. I bumble along, telling everyone that “I’m ok” but that isn’t the truth. I am still devastated by her death and still cry most days for my lost love.
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