Feeling lost

Hi, i lost my dad 15 years ago, and since then supported my mum through her grief as she struggled after my dad passed away. My mum died suddenly and unexpectedly 8 weeks ago, i also have no living grandparents. I do have siblings but dont have a close relationship with them. I was extremely close to my mum and saw her and spoke every day. I have had to sort and clear my childhood home alongside my husband, and now everything physical from my childhood has gone. I only live 10 doors away. I have never felt so alone and lost and the grief comes in waves that literally knock me for 6. My husband has been so supportive and such a rock, but i feel frustrated and angry often. I have started a journal where i write letters to my mum and dad which help a little. I feel very guilty as my 3 children were so close to their nanny, but i dont feel i have been there for them due to just struggling to deal with my emotions. I have tried to continue normally on a daily basis. Nights seem to be the worse, where i struggle to sleep. A day hasnt gone by where i dont cry. I am resentful and jealous as my husband still has a grandparent, his parents and close relationships with his siblings.

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Hello @Spectre05 ,

I can see that you’re new to the community, so I wanted to say that I am so sorry for the loss of your parents that brings you here.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that may help right now.

Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.

Take care,

Alex