My died of a unexpected burst ulcer (didn’t know she had one) on 11th July. I.m an only child and dad died after a fall on 31 may 2013. Been surviving by just keeping busy but yesterday I literally felt my heart break and have pretty much cried since. Feel lost. I would talk to mum daily about my day at work . Still finding it hard to adjust to not being able to call her. Felt cant fully grieve because probate going through so still have to clear house etc when done
Oh my goodness, how terrible to lose both parents so suddenly, my dad died of a heart attack 10 years ago and it was such a shock, my mum died of cancer 28 years ago but I miss her and all the things she’s missed still hurts.
I’m so sorry you’re shouldering this burden as an only child. Thinking of you and sending love, keep sending messages, this forum does really help. Bun xx
Hi Debbie
I’m sorry about the loss of your mum and dad so close together. My husband’s father died 3 years to the day that his mum died and we thought it was such a coincidence that he went soon after and on the same anniversary. Your feelings are normal and they are temporary, they will eventually pass. Grief, as you are probably finding, is like a tsunami. It crashes over you when you least expect it and it can feel overwhelming. After a while, the huge wave retreats and you’re left to pick up the debris of a life you once knew. You’ve no choice but to rebuild but it’s hard and you keep falling down. You pick yourself up and you cling to a branch but it snaps, and you fall down again back into a gushing tide that although it’s retreating, it’s still carrying you with it and you can’t see dry land. This is the grief experience and it’s unique to all of us but it’s also a normal fact of life. You will be OK Debbie, it’s all emotion and upheaval at the moment but once probate has concluded you will get another period of grieving but also closure. Life will take you forward. You’ll never completely get over the loss but it blends into your future life, the painful edges wear off and you’re left with sweet memories of loss but a life loved and lived. xxx
Hi Debbie
I’m sorry about the loss of your mum and dad so close together. My husband’s father died 3 years to the day that his mum died and we thought it was such a coincidence that he went soon after and on the same anniversary. Your feelings are normal and they are temporary, they will eventually pass. Grief, as you are probably finding, is like a tsunami. It crashes over you when you least expect it and it can feel overwhelming. After a while, the huge wave retreats and you’re left to pick up the debris of a life you once knew. You’ve no choice but to rebuild but it’s hard and you keep falling down. You pick yourself up and you cling to a branch but it snaps, and you fall down again back into a gushing tide that although it’s retreating, it’s still carrying you with it and you can’t see dry land. This is the grief experience and it’s unique to all of us but it’s also a normal fact of life. You will be OK Debbie, it’s all emotion and upheaval at the moment but once probate has concluded you will get another period of grieving but also closure. Life will take you forward. You’ll never completely get over the loss but it blends into your future life, the painful edges wear off and you’re left with sweet memories of loss but a life loved and lived. xxx